PUBLISHED: 16/06/2022

CONTRARY - FINN SHELBY X READER; PART 33

PUBLISHED: 05/07/2022

Part 1

MASTERLIST

TAGLIST

READER'S POV

Saoirse trotted downstairs, and came to a stop in front of the roaring fireplace, between Finn and I in our armchairs. She shifted restlessly from foot to foot. Finn Junior came up and rubbed against her legs.

"What's up?" Finn asked her tenderly, setting down his newspaper and watching as she fiddled with the hem of her dress.

"Well — I've been to sleepovers at all of my friends houses, but none of them have been to a sleepover here. Can I have one here, for my birthday next week?" Saoirse asked, swaying from side to side.

Birthday. She was turning eight. My little sister, the one who's nappies I used to change, was turning eight. Part of me refused to believe it.

"Sure." I replied unsurely, side-eyeing Finn, hoping he would catch the hesitation in my tone.

"I can't see why not." He added, which made Saoirse grin and run back upstairs.

"Finn you bastard, you should've said no!" I hissed quietly as I went and sat on the arm of his chair so I could speak softly, without fear of Saoirse hearing me.

"Why? Surely kids'll be able to come." He reasoned, placing his free hand on the small of my back, making me sigh.

"Finn, you're the brother of the most feared men in Birmingham. And I'm your wife." I said matter-of-factly, "Surely you see why people would be hesitant to let their kids come here, especially overnight."

"I know they'd be hesitant. We'd be able to get some of her friends to come here somehow." Finn replied, taking a sip of his whiskey.

"How? Rocking up at their houses and saying 'Your child is coming to Saoirse's sleepover by order of the Peaky fucking Blinders!'" I snapped, and Finn made a face that told me he agreed entirely with my stupid suggestion.

"No, Finn, we're not going to order kids to come have a sleepover! Use your common sense!" I barked then pinched his ear, making him yelp.

Serves him right for being an idiot.

"Well what about Lynn and the rest of the girls? They can put in good words for us, can't they?" He pointed out, and I suddenly felt bad for thinking of him as an idiot.

"Let's have a piss up with them and their blokes, at the Garrison or somewhere else, and everyone can see it. They'll ask about us, and they'll tell them good things. Hopefully." Finn said, and I nodded.

"Hilda can probably put in good word too, she has influence. I'll ask if I can help her with a bake sale, sell some of my stuff at her stall." I added, knowing the power her baking skills held over the women of Small Heath.

Along with having bake sales every Thursday afternoon, she also ran a book club which met every Tuesday afternoon, and went to Church every Sunday, as well as playing netball every Saturday and attending netball practice on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday afternoons. How she found the time to do all that with her job at the factory and with her rambunctious daughter, I'd never know.

•••

I put the finishing touches on the icing on top of Saoirse's cake as Finn finished organising the last lolly platter. Today was the day. My baby sister turned eight.

We woke her up with breakfast in bed, and a decorated house. We put streamers damn near everywhere, balloons everywhere, and a banner along the wall of the living room that said 'Happy Birthday Saoirse'. She loved it all, nearly too excited to open her presents.

Saoirse's big present from us was in the back yard, meaning that we had to keep her towards the front of the house so she didn't see it.

Her little presents we allowed her to open. I had gotten her netball shoes (she played in the junior games, alongside Daisy, who she had become fast friends with), new clothes and hair ribbons, and new books. Finn had also gotten her new clothes (we went shopping together so we weren't doubling up on anything), a new bracelet, a pair of (faux) pearl earrings because she was forever asking to wear mine, and some new toys. Together, along with her big gift, we got her a new silver heart locket with a picture of our Shelby-Gold-Jesus family on one side, and her mother on the other.

Other people had been dropping off their presents for her all throughout the day.

We weren't going to have a party, decided by Saoirse, only a dinner with family and friends, then a sleepover. Rose made a tradition that started with Ezzie and kept it going with the rest of us that we never entertained other people on our birthday, only having parties and sleepovers and other things if we wanted to. Our birthdays were our days, no one else's. We could do whatever we wanted, on our birthdays.

I loved that rule, because Marian had always forced me to have a party every year that I lived with her. I hated every single one of them.

I was slightly happy that Saoirse didn't want a party, because there would be a lot of people there. My family always had a lot of people at the birthday parties, and that amount would only grow with the gaggle of friends Saoirse had made.

If Saoirse was going to be like the rest of us, she would only have an eighteenth. I was yet to have mine. Ezzie had an eighteenth, but she was asleep by midnight, everyone else still partying on. Bonnie's eighteenth carried on for a week, and it was only at the end of that week long bender that we were all sober enough to realise that Bonnie was MIA. It turns out that he ended up halfway across the country with a few mates.

I snorted at the memory, making Finn look at me in confusion, momentarily stopping his walk over to the table with the lollies.

I waved for him to keep going, then placed the cake in the fridge.

The dogs started barking, making me look out of the kitchen window. Ada and Karl had just arrived in Ada's car. The first of Saoirse's guests for the sleepover. She only had Daisy left to come, but her and Hilda lived only a five minute drive up the road, it wasn't like they were going to be late.

"It's Ada," I announced, heading out of the kitchen, through the living room and mudroom, opening the front door.

"Aunt (Y/N)!" Karl said happily, racing up the path to meet me, hugging me.

I returned the hug, then he wiggled out of my grip and ran to Finn, then inside to Saoirse, who was doing a puzzle on the floor in front of the bay window.

Ada came up the walkway, a present under each arm.

"The boy's bag is in the backseat of the car, I'll grab it after Saoirse opens our presents," Ada said, making me nod.

"I'll grab it," Finn offered, passing her on the stairs and jogging down to the car.

"One present from each of us," She told me, adjusting them under her arms as we headed inside, Daisy, Duke, and Tuck following us.

I heard Finn come back inside, the door shutting behind him. He went and placed Karl's bag on the couch, then came back over to me, standing behind me and wrapping his arms around my waist, laying his cheek on top of my head. My hands came up and rested on top of his.

"Happy birthday, little miss!" Ada greeted Saoirse, and Karl hopped up, coming over to grab his present from under his mum's right arm, then turned and faced Saoirse.

"From me," He declared as she came over and grabbed the present, which was a long, rectangular shaped box.

I could hear something rattle softly when she took the present from Karl. She looked at me, and I nodded, then she gently undid the white bow, then carefully stripped the box of the blue wrapping paper. She was one of those people who hated ripping wrapping paper, because people took so long and put so much care into wrapping stuff, a trait she got from Dad. Under the wrapping paper was a cardboard box. She took the lid off to reveal a sky blue soprano ukulele with a black outline of a butterfly on the front, under the bridge and to the right.

"Oh, thank you!" She squealed, putting the box on the floor then pulling Karl into a tight hug.

The boy hugged her back, laughing. My heart melted at the pair.

"Look on the back of it," Ada advised, and Saoirse quickly stepped away from Karl and grabbed her ukulele by the neck, gently lifting it out of the box.

She flipped it so the back was facing up, and ran her finger along it. I could see some gold wording glint under the light.

"To my best friend Saoirse, from Karl, with love," She read, and looked at Karl.

"Thank you. Truly," She said softly, and you could tell she meant it.

Karl just replied with 'S'Alright'.

"Aren't they the cutest," I mused, and Ada nodded, Finn humming in agreement.

"They make me want to have another one," Ada admitted, watching as Saoirse tuned her ukulele.

"One couldn't hurt us, aye (Y/N)?" Finn asked, making Ada look at us in surprise.

I knew he was joking. We didn't feel ready for a baby yet, although I doubt we ever would. No one truly feels ready for a baby.

"You have one before you turn eighteen and I'll strangle you and my brother with the umbilical cord," Ada threatened, but there was no malice behind her words, just worry.

"I don't plan on having one anytime soon," I reassured her, and she relaxed her posture, nodding.

"Here, Sersh, come look at what Ada's got for you," I called out, and Saoirse bounded over, handing her ukulele Karl to hold.

She took the very medium sized box from Ada, and her eyebrows scrunched together.

"It's — heavy," Saoirse said, sounding surprised.

Karl bounced on his heels, waiting for her to open it.

Saoirse painstakingly unwrapped this present, and gasped. It was a light blue jewellery box, painted to look like a cloudy blue sky, a butterfly on the top of the lid. She opens it, and it immediately started chiming, playing a tinkly tune.

"Oh, it has a butterfly and it spins!" Saoirse gasped, flipping the box around to show us.

"Finn told me that he was going to get you jewellery, so I decided to get you something to put it in," Ada explained, and Karl tapped the back of it.

Saoirse tilted the box so she could see what he was tapping it for.

"To darling Saoirse. The sky is the limit. From Ada dearest," Saoirse recited the words on the back, and grinned at Ada.

"Thanks, A," Saoirse said, then started fiddling around with the key on the back as the song stopped.

"Why don't you go put your jewellery box upstairs, then we can go and look at your new present in the backyard?" Finn suggested as he stepped away from me, and Saoirse nodded, running upstairs.

"Don't run on those stairs!" I hollered after them, even though it would have fallen on deaf ears.

"Have you made dinner yet?" Ada asked as I lead her and Finn outside.

"No, starting it as soon as Saoirse sees her present," Finn replied, then turned back down the hallway, "Karl, you cover her eyes, this is going to be a great fucking surprise!"

"Stop swearing at the kids," I chastised Finn, swatting him on the arm.

He just chuckled in response as the kids came down the hallway, Karl obeying Finn's orders, his hands securely over Saoirse's eyes, the pair giggling as they walked.

Karl's jaw dropped as he saw Saoirse's present.

"She can look now," Finn told his nephew, and he quickly let his arms hang by his side, uncovering Saoirse's eyes.

Her brown eyes went wide with shock as she laid her gaze on her new, baby blue playhouse, and play equipment. The playhouse itself was two story, with a cute little picket fence front yard, with a toy kitchen and dining room down the bottom, and a bedroom up the top. The bedroom itself held a daybed with a metal frame that made it look like a couch, a privacy screen, a full body mirror, and a trunk full of dress up clothes.

The play equipment was brown, the wood unpainted, but the accessories were dark blue. On the left side of the sky loft was monkey bars, which connected up with the sky loft, so you could land on the floor of the loft. The sky fort had a bench underneath, and a patch of grass next to it. The sky loft itself was empty. A set of steep stairs was connected to the back of it, with blue railings to help climb up it. At the front of the sky loft, connected to it, was a climbing wall and a slide. Then, to the right of the sky loft was a lookout (which was accessible from the inside of the loft). The bottom of the lookout was attached to the beam that held the swings. We had two slings swings, one horse gilder swing, and one nest swing. The beam holding up the swings was metal, painted to look like wood, so I didn't have to worry about the beam collapsing.

We decided to get her play equipment because she only had 'inside ' stuff, no outside stuff. The house was big enough for her to have play dates inside but it got stale eventually.

"That's the best present a big brother and a big sister could ever give!" Saoirse screeched, coming over and hugging Finn and I quickly.

"I love it! Karl, come down the slide with me!" Saoirse demanded, grabbing the boys hand and leading him to the play equipment, making us laugh.

I heard a sniffle to my left, and looked over at Finn, who was rubbing his eyes.

"You okay, darling?" I asked, feeling concerned for my husband.

"She called me her brother," Finn mumbled, cheeks going red, and I gave him a soft smile, reaching up and brushing away a stray tear on his cheek.

"She loves you, you know," I replied softly, turning back to the kids and placing my head on his shoulder.

"We both do," I added, moving my head to look up at him, just in time to catch the ends of his lips quirk up.

•••

THIRD PERSON'S POV

The Golds (bar you and Saoirse), the Shelbys (bar Finn and Karl), The Jesuses, Johnny Doggs and his brood, Charlie Strong, Curly, and Hilda had not long ago finished dinner, then the rest of the guests went back to their houses, having spent the afternoon with Saoirse.

You sat in Finn's rocking chair, watching as Daisy, Karl, and Saoirse played with Saoirse's new toys, now dressed up with outfits from the dress up chest. They had dressed up the cat and the dogs too. You had also been roped into dressing up, putting your wedding dress on, as well as a pair of wings from Saoirse's dress up chest, borrowing a stick from the garden outside and wrapping some streamers around it. You made a damn good faerie if you did say so yourself.

Finn was currently in the office, doing something for Tommy, which annoyed you slightly. Tommy couldn't even respect the fact that it was Saoirse's birthday.

"Faerie godmother (Y/N)! Make Finn come out here and play dress up with us," Saoirse demanded, making you snort.

"Oh, my dearest goddaughter, princess Saoirse, I don't believe I'll be able to pull the noble Mr Shelby from his work," You sighed theatrically, throwing the back of your palm onto your forehead to add a dramatic effect.

The children giggled at your antics.

"Well, if you can't pull him away from work, maybe we should," Daisy suggested, fiddling with the tail on the dinosaur one piece she was wearing, making the rest of the kids cheer.

"Chivalrous knight Karl, lead us on this journey!" Saoirse commanded, and Karl hopped up from his spot on the floor, then helped the girls up, leading them to the office.

You followed them, intrigued about what was going to happen.

Karl knocked on the door, and Finn called out 'come in'. Karl swung the door open, and the trio entered the office. You came to stand in the doorway, leaning against the door jamb with your arms crossed.

"Finn, you've got to come play dress up with us." Saoirse ordered, looking at the man sat at the table.

Finn sighed, rubbing his temples. You frowned at the sight of your obviously stressed husband.

"Sersh, he's busy, come on," You said, getting ready to usher the kids from the room.

"No, no. I'll come out and play, just give me a few seconds to pack up," Finn reassured your sister, finally looking up from the papers that littered his desk.

He walked around his desk, and rubbed his knuckles against her cheek affectionately.

The children cheered and ran past you, back down the hall to the living room. Your husband came over to you, leaning down and planting a kiss on your lips.

"You sure you're okay to play dress ups? There's cupcakes in the oven, I'll remind them of those, they'll forget all about it," You told your husband, who shook his head, walking back over to his desk.

"I'll be fine," He replied, gathering all of the papers and putting them into the file they belonged in, then placing that file into the bottom drawer and locking the drawer.

He looked back over at you, taking in the sight of you in your wedding dress, hair loose and over your shoulder. You looked gorgeous. An absolute vision.

"Take a picture, it'll last longer," You teased your husband, gave a boyish grin in reply.

"A picture wouldn't be able to hold a candle to the real deal," Finn said cheekily, making your cheeks flush.

"Finn! Hurry up!" Saoirse commanded from the living room, and you and your husband headed down the hallway to them.

"I'm here," Finn announced as he stepped through the doorway, and immediately got a clown costume thrown his way.

"Go put that on, then we're going to paint nails," Saoirse informed him.

"Yes boss," Finn replied with a grin, then headed back down the hallway to the bathroom.

"(Y/N), come sit. Karl's got to do your nails, then you do Daisy's, then she does Finn's, and Finn does mine. I've already done Karl's nails," Saoirse explained, and Karl showed you his orange nails.

"They look very nice," You complimented as you went and sat in front of Karl, who was already opening a yellow bottle of nail polish.

Smart boy.

Finn entered the living room, his curly hair ruffled by the clothes he had taken off and the costume he had put on. You bit back a laugh as you looked at your husband.

Saoirse explained the nail polish order to him, and he sat in front of Daisy, who gave him a set of immaculately painted hot pink nails.

As Finn blew on his nails to dry them quicker, you couldn't resist a laugh at your husband. Daisy then scolded you for not paying attention to her nails, and you hurriedly went back to painting her nails red. Once you had finished her nails, you got up to check on the cupcakes.

As soon as you walked through the doorway to the kitchen you heard the timer you set go off with a 'ding!'

You got the cupcakes out of the oven, and placed them onto a cooling rack. You placed three cupcakes onto a tea towel, then hid the bundle in the pantry, and headed back to the living room, cooling rack in your hands.

"Alright, you lot, let's head up to Saoirse's room and settle down. We can eat the cupcakes once they've cooled down." You announced, and the kids started to move upstairs.

You noticed how sluggish they seemed, but you knew they'd get second wind once they ate the cupcakes.

"I'll start popping balloons," Finn told you, and you nodded, then headed upstairs, being careful not to drop any cupcakes.

"Hey, (Y/N), can you braid our hair?" Saoirse asked as you sat the cupcakes on the foot end of her bed.

You heard Finn popping a balloon already.

"Yeah, I can," You answered, kicking a balloon out of your way.

Daisy and Duke didn't seem bothered by the balloons, to your surprise.

"Want Finn to pop these balloons or leave them?" You questioned, gathering all of the balloons on her floor near the door.

"Pop those ones," Saoirse decided, and you kicked them out into the hallway and shut the door.

Karl handed you the brush, comb, and hair ribbons. You thanked the boy, and started with Saoirse's hair first, doing twin French braids.

"Want the same ones as her?" You asked Daisy, and she shrugged.

You decided to go the same as Saoirse's. Once she was done, you told the kids they could have their cupcakes. They all got three each. They ate their cupcakes in silence as they struggled to stay sitting upright. You chuckled at the trio. Once they were done, you tucked them into Saoirse's bed, then turned on her nightlight, and left the room, cooling rack in hand.

You shuffled along the hall, kicking all of the balloons in the upstairs hall down the stairs, where your husband was having a spot of fun stabbing them to pop them. You grabbed all of the streamers that were in the upstairs hallway, and ambled downstairs and into the kitchen, washing everything up, then sitting them on the drying rack. By the time you were done, Finn had started pulling the streamers down. You pulled down the ones in the kitchen and the downstairs hallway, then placed them on your armchair, Finn doing the same. Once you were done the streamers, you pulled down the banner, carefully folding it up.

Finn felt slightly disappointed that there were no more cupcakes left, but no matter. Saoirse had a good day and that was all that mattered.

"We've three cupcakes to share," You informed your husband, making him grin as you lead him into the kitchen and into the pantry.

You grabbed the tea towel and unfolded it, giving your husband a cupcake and devouring your own. Finn wasted no time eating his. When you reached for the last one, you heard the kitchen door swung open, making you freeze.

"I'm not sharing a cupcake with a child half my size," Your husband whispered as you stood up, handing him the tea towel and cupcake.

"Shut up," You hissed, but he words held no malice.

You exited the pantry, and found Daisy there, looking very tired.

"Thirsty," She mumbled, and you got her a bottle of milk from the fridge, telling her to take it up to Saoirse's room so none of them had to come back downstairs.

She did what you asked, and you headed back into the pantry, where Finn was in the process of splitting the cupcake in half.

"You can have the big half if you give me a kiss," Finn offered with a smirked.

You rolled your eyes, smiling softly, and placed a chaste kiss on your husband's lips.

"I would have kissed you anyway," You told your husband, who grinned.

"I would have given you the big half anyway," He replied, making you smile at him.

"To a successful sleepover!" You declared quietly, holding your cupcake half in the air.

Finn did the same, and you started giggling again.

As you sat in the pantry in your wedding dress, your husband in a clown outfit, the pair of you giggling into the night you decided that life, as this very moment, was good.

§§§

Not proofread because I am tired Oof

Also you guys aren't ready for chapter 43; I've got the biggest surprise AHHH

Also sometimes the published date can be earlier than the date I published it here because I use the date that I published the chapter on Wattpad :))

Love y'all ❤️

- Sunflower x

TAGLIST

@meadownicolee

@toothlessmcleod

@im-your-possession

@bethabear12

@paisley-37

@shelundeadxxxx

@bluehairdie

@krillfromsky

@cucumberfingefsandwiches

NEXT PART

Part 34

CONTRARY - FINN SHELBY X READER; PART 12

PUBLISHED: 25/05/2022

!!FIRST PART HERE!!

Part 1

MASTERLIST

READER'S POV

Luca dialled the betting den, letting it ring. I strained my ears for any other sounds outside, but I couldn't hear any. The window in the room had been covered with a curtain, and the two other doors in the room had been closed. I noticed about three deadbolts on each door. They had planned to kidnap someone.

"Hello?" I heard Tommy's voice come through the phone.

"Thomas Shelby. I think I have something of yours," Luca greeted, looking straight at me.

"Where's the girl?" Tommy asked coldly, and Matteo shoved me roughly into Luca, who put the receiver to my ear, "And I thought we agreed no fucking kids! She's a kid, Luca!"

"Speak." Luca commanded, staring down at me, "And tell him that you're only means to an end."

"I'm here, Tommy." I muttered into the phone, "And he told me to tell you I'm only means to an end."

"Have they hurt you?" He asked, sounding concerned.

"Only when they grabbed me. I came to not long ago." I informed him, then switched to Shelta, "I don't know where I am. Take care of you and yours and mine, forget about me, I'll be fine."

"Don't be fucking stupid, you and yours are mine now. I'll figure it out. I got you into this mess and I'll get you out." Tommy informed me, making me frown.

"Don't you dare try to find me, watch your back so you don't get hurt!" I snapped, then Luca hung up.

"You heard that boys? Thomas Shelby cares enough for her that he'll come for her. Now, all we have to do is wait until they get sloppy." Luca stated, making the men cheer.

I hoped Tommy's word wasn't his law. If he got hurt, it would bring the whole family down, and everything they did, everything they lost, would all be for naught.

FINN'S POV

I was livid. (Y/N), my wife, was on the phone and Tommy wouldn't even let me speak to her. I wanted to know if she was okay too.

"Let's go for a walk," Arthur commanded, clapping my shoulder and leading me out of Tommy's office roughly.

I followed, knowing that I would only cause trouble if I stayed. I slowed down as I heard the quick tinkling of a bell. Finn Junior. Arthur stopped too, until I felt Finn Junior rub up against my legs, no doubt leaving his grey fur all over my pant legs. Arthur started moving again, albeit slower this time so Finn Junior could keep up with us. He lead me to my house.

"Pack a suitcase, Finny boy," He instructed me.

I walked upstairs and did as he asked, grabbing my suitcase from under the bed and throwing some clothes into it.

"What about (Y/N)'s stuff?" I called back down as the living grey doormat came and jumped up on my bed and started cleaning himself.

"Leave it here, she can pack if she gets back!" Arthur yelled in reply.

"When she comes back." I muttered, heading to the bathroom to grab my toiletries.

I refused to think any other way. They wouldn't want to kill you, to them you shouldn't be an important part of my family, just a traveller girl that got married in.

I threw the rest of my stuff into my suitcase, the stuff that could fit into it anyway. I could always make two trips. I hoped.

I walked back out to Arthur, and he led me across the street to his house, and told me to get into his car. I complied, then helped Finn Junior up, sitting him on my suitcase. He curled up on it and purred as Arthur started the car, driving down the streets of Small Heath, taking us to Artillery Square.

He stopped the car and got out. I did the same, holding open the door until the overgrown lint ball got off of my suitcase and jumped out of the car, meowing at me as if thanking me for my services, then grabbed my suitcase and followed Arthur. I got up to the top of the stairs before realising that the tinkling sound had stopped. I turned around, and the cat was sat at the bottom of the stairs.

"Can't you walk yourself up?" I asked, and the cat stayed in his spot, making me roll my eyes.

If (Y/N) were here he'd be up these stairs in the blink of an eye.

Arthur yanked my suitcase out of my grip, holding it.

I looked down at Finn Junior, who was looking up at me expectantly. I sighed and walked down the stairs, crouching in front of him, then he gave me a slow blink. I slipped both my arms under his stomach, right next to his legs like you always did, making sure I had a good grip on him then slowly standing up.

"Hurry up!" Arthur commanded lightly, watching me carry the cat up the stairs rather awkwardly.

Awkward for me. The cat was probably enjoying every second of my slaving around for him.

"You try carrying this cat, it feels heavier than your Billy!" I snapped making him roll his eyes.

With the size of him, I was absolutely sure that he was heavier than Billy. Arthur lead me to the very apartment he was sat in at midday. I cursed that old slut for bringing him here. You'd be safe, at home with the cat, probably eating the biscuits I stashed away if she didn't.

"There you go, brother," He announced, throwing my poor suitcase onto the floor, "Home sweet home!"

"Place for you to spend time with your wife, bring your mates, play games, gamble, cards, and you keep an eye on our backyard," He informed me as I looked around the room, inspecting it, "It's Artillery Square. Place is full of Communists. The strikers. Having a Shelby — or two — will keep them in order."

It was at this moment in time that Finn Junior decided he wanted to get down, wiggling in my arms, then rolling over and trying to scratch my face. I leaned back, dodging his claws, hitting my head on the doorframe in the process, then crouched and let him down, and watched as he sauntered around the room, avoiding any broken glass on the floor.

"You little bastard! I should shoot you and turn you into a rug to put in front of the fire!" I bellowed, making Arthur chuckle.

"Light the fucking fire, take some of this shit off the walls. Curly will be over later with some poison for the rats. Unless your cat eats them." Arthur informed me, making Finn Junior hiss in protest.

Lazy bastard. I'd have to try to get you to stop spoiling him when you came back.

"Arthur," I began shakily, getting his attention.

"Huh?" He responded, turning back around to face me.

"This morning, I wouldn't have been able to pull that trigger. I know I wouldn't, they would have just walked past. I'm not John." I said, a lump forming in my throat, "I know I'm not."

Sometimes, like today, they treat me like John.

"All right," Arthur cut me off gently, coming over and placing a comforting hand on my shoulder, "You're my brother. I know you're not. I know. In the end, its God who pulls that fucking trigger anyway."

"We don't get to decide who lives, and who dies Finn," He reassured, placing his other hand on my other shoulder, "Not us. You just have to ... flip a switch; in your head."

He clapped me on the shoulder, then wordlessly walked out.

It would be hard to flip that switch. The older boys went to France and I didn't. Some days, like today, they throw me in the deep end, and others, like when Tommy decided that we were to marry, they treat me like a child, always deciding and doing things for me. It was unfair, and confusing. I'd have to ask you how you managed when you helped your father and brother.

I looked around, and found a broom in the closet next to the front door.

"We gonna clean this place up for your mum?" I asked the cat, who gave a sound of agreement.

As I swept, all I could focus on was how quiet it was. In the time you had been living with me, it was never quiet in the house. You were always making some sort of noise, whether it was complaining, arguing with me, singing, bouncing your leg and tapping your shoe on the floor, chewing your gum, or practicing your reading.

I missed that noise, and I was sure little Finn did too.

§§§

Y'all I pierced my own nose last night and it actually turned out decent lol

Love y'all ❤️

- Sunflower x

NEXT PART

Part 13

CONTRARY - FINN SHELBY X READER; PART 40

PUBLISHED: 16/07/2022

Part 1

MASTERLIST

TAGLIST

THIRD PERSON'S POV

You headed into the changing rooms, chattering to your teammates about how you won the game. Your netball shoes were perfect, having gel insoles. Finn knew what he was doing when he got them for you as a gift. You'd have to tell him when you meet up with him and Saoirse after you were done changing.

You were about to head into a stall, when someone tapped your shoulder. You turned around to see Dinah standing there, her braids up in a ponytail today.

"You grab the right sized dress today?" She  asked quietly, and you scrunched your eyebrows together in confusion.

"Yeah, of course," You replied equally as low.

"It's getting a bit tight, especially around the midriff," She advised you, making you scowl as you stepped into the stall and slammed the door shut behind you.

You looked at yourself in the mirror that hung up behind the door. Your stomach was bigger. But, you ate a lot, and you didn't do nearly as much walking as you did when you were a traveller. That would be why.

You'd tell Dinah that and make her apologise, you decided as you quickly changed.

•••

You and Polly sat at a table in a small café, heading there for your lunch break. Finn was outside, finishing off his smoke.

You tapped your fingers against your teacup, feeling content. Polly eyed you as you looked out of the window, lost in thought.

"Polly," You began, sounding far away.

Polly gave a hum of acknowledgment before finishing off her tea.

"You and my father — What's going on there?" You questioned softly, looking at Polly.

Polly shifted in her seat, not uncomfortable with the question, just caught off guard.

"We've got a thing," She admitted confidently, and you grinned at the woman.

"In your forties and still breaking hearts," You teased, making her smile, a faint pink tinting her cheeks.

Finn came back in, and slid into the booth next to you. You looked down at your cup, then took a sip and slid it over to Polly, who looked surprised.

"I've been eating more and someone even said that my stomach looked bigger. I don't want to go to the doctor if I'm not actually there yet. I don't think I am. I don't know if I'll ever be there. My parents, both of them, they don't have babies easily," You explained, dropping your voice low on that last piece of information, and Polly nodded understandingly as she grasped your cup.

Aberama had told her that. Finn had no idea that Aberama struggled, but seeing how Ezzie, Bonnie, and Saoirse were all spaced out it made sense. Traveller couples usually popped out a baby every year or so.

Finn slipped his hand into yours, and squeezed it three times, watching as his aunt looked at your tea leaves. He felt somewhat nervous. He thought that maybe you were pregnant; he noticed small changes, like the way you always got sick, and the way that everything made you feel sick. He noticed that you ate more and that you gained weight.

"You didn't tell me that," Finn murmured to you, feeling a bit disappointed that you failed to mention it.

"We'll talk about it later," You brushed him off, wanting to focus on what was happening now.

He nodded. He wanted kids, and he thought you did too, but that little tidbit that you (and anyone else who knew your family history) failed to mention threw him off, just a bit.

"What do you think, Finn?" Polly asked her nephew as she sat down your teacup.

"I think she's expecting," Finn answered honestly, making you look at him funny.

"I noticed that your," Finn trailed off and cupped his hands over his chest, as if he were holding two things up, making you snort and Polly roll her eyes at her nephew, "They got bigger."

"Boy. You could've just said her tits got bigger. And of course that's the first fucking thing you noticed. Boys," Polly commented, and you chuckled, bouncing your leg.

Polly's crimson lips curled into a smile.

"Congratulations. You're in the family way," Polly announced, and you felt your mouth go dry.

Finn felt breathless, as if he ran a marathon. He brought your now shaky hand up to his mouth, brushing it against his lips gently.

Ada and Ezzie were definitely going to kill the pair of you, and throw your bodies into the cut.

•••

You and Finn sat in your kitchen on the floor between the bench and the island, cups of tea and a plate of biscuits between the pair of you.

It was closer to sunrise than sunset, and the pair of you should've well and truly been asleep by now, but a visit to your family healers had you feeling fretful. And hopeful. You absentmindedly put a hand on your stomach, patting it. You hand told anyone that you were expecting, yet.

"Did you really think you wouldn't have a baby until later?" Finn asked softly, grabbing a biscuit off of the plate.

"Yes," You admitted, looking away from him, finding the cupboard handle very interesting, "I was ten years coming, Finn. Ezzie came easily but Bonnie didn't. After Bonnie, they kept trying. Another big gap there. Twelve years. And it certainly wasn't Rose who was the problem. The healers even said so."

Finn nodded, and considered reaching out to touch you, to reassure you some way, but decided against it. If he started reassuring you he wouldn't get out what he needed to ask.

"Did you ever think of telling me that you didn't think you'd have babies easily?" Finn questioned, leaning back on his palms.

You snapped your head in your husband's direction, narrowing your eyes.

"Fucking — Tommy knew. And he still forced us to marry. I don't even know why you're still on about the bastard, the healers said I'd be fine to get pregnant after this one. That I won't have any problems. That is that." You spat, and Finn's jaw clenched.

Fucking Tommy. He could have the big, happy family he wanted but would leave his brother to struggle if it came down to it. Unfair. It always was, Finn always got the short end of the stick. It didn't matter if you couldn't have kids. You could always adopt. What mattered is that Tommy didn't tell him something, yet again.

"Are you mad at me?" You asked your husband as you dipped a biscuit into your tea.

Finn didn't miss the vulnerable tone hanging off your words.

"Darling, of course not," Finn replied hurriedly, truthfully, his words like a bandage that stopped the guilt flowing from your wound.

He shuffled over and knelt in front of you, pulling you into a tight hug. You returned it, grasping his night shirt so tightly that you were slightly scared you might rip it.

"I love you," He mumbled against the crook of your neck, his breath hot and the words heavy.

"I love you too," You murmured in reply, and tried not to let your eyes fill up with tears.

You stayed like that until your knuckles couldn't take being curled up anymore, and released your husband, who shifted back so he was sitting on his heels.

It didn't last long, because he moved forward and tenderly placed his lips on yours, hands cupping the sides of your face as he did so. He wanted contact. To reassure you that he loved you, like he should've done earlier on.

You continued your tender touches and soft words well into the night, even after you moved up into your bedroom, your tea gone cold and poured down the sink and biscuits put back into the container, to be worried about another day.

§§§

we've got a proper pregnancy confirmation from none other than THE Polly Gray

Although you guys probably knew from last chapter lmao

I know my chapters are shorter than usual but you guys will get the long chapters again once I start writing about s5

Love y'all ❤️

- Sunflower x

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NEXT PART

Part 41

CONTRARY - FINN SHELBY X READER; PART 47

PUBLISHED: 26/07/2022

(I forgot to copy some chapters onto here shhh)

THIRD PERSON'S POV

You woke up to an urgent pulling of your hair, and sat up. One of the twins. Isaac. He gave you a cuddle, and you held him a bit tighter than necessary, then got out of bed, balancing him on your hip. You headed into the bathroom, washing your face, and wiping Isaac's with a baby wipe. The house was painfully quiet.

You poked your head into the nursery as you passed it. Rosalie was gone. Finn probably had her. Or Isiah. He had come to stay at yours for a bit. It was too painful for him to stay there, at the house that he and Ezzie had made their own. You didn't blame him. You hadn't been in Bonnie's apartment or vardo yet. You didn't want to.

You headed downstairs, sighing at the fact that there was no noise. Saoirse would usually be humming, or giggling, or reading a story to the babies and animals, or playing an instrument, or singing, or talking. Just making noise. But the only noise was the cat meowing. You shook your head to rid yourself of the sad thoughts, not wanting to ruin your day before it started.

You hummed, although it wasn't nearly as nice as Saoirse used to, and entered the kitchen, where your daughter was up in her high chair, and your other son was sat at the table, both of them eating toast. Your husband was sat with a vacant look on his face. He looked more than tired. He looked exhausted, and you knew it wasn't just a physical one. Finn had lost two of his best mates in the one go.

"Finn?" You said softly, putting Isaac next to Finley, who gladly grabbed some of his brother's honey covered toast, even after Finley tried to swat his hands away.

"Just — tired," Finn explained hoarsely, and you pursed your lips and nodded.

You made your way around the table to your husband, and leaned down, giving him a quick kiss, then pulled him into a tight hug.

Finn placed a hand on your knee, and squeezed it thrice, grabbing his coffee with his other hand.

"I love you too," You replied, grabbing the mug next to his own and sipping it, knowing it was meant for you.

"You staying home again?" Finn asked, feeling a bit more normal after his cry.

"Yeah, I think Jeremiah has things to do so one of the girls and I will be watching Jeremy and Bon-Bon." You explained, and your husband nodded.

Isiah needed a bit more help with the babies now that Ezzie was gone, and you were all too willing to help out with your niece and nephew, and so was the girls from your netball team. They were all absolute godsends, always bringing around food and offering to watch the babies and taking Saoirse to and from school, even though it was all out of their way.

"It's Poll's birthday today," Finn informed you, and you swore, then walked over to the fridge, grabbing a small box off of the top of it.

"Can you give her this just in case I don't see her?" You asked, and Finn nodded.

Rosalie, now done with her toast, squealed, wanting to get down.

"No, you're in baby jail because you keep on opening the baby gates!" Finn chastised his daughter, wagging a finger in her direction, and Rosalie giggled.

"Oh, Finn, don't put her in baby jail! She's just exploring, right ring-a-round the Rosie?" You defended jokingly, going and getting your daughter out of your chair, bringing her over to sit on your lap.

Finn reached over and grabbed the boys' toast, and told them to come around the table to the three of you. They did so. Finn balanced the pair of them on his legs, and listened as Rosalie babbled to the twins, and Finley babbled back to her, throwing in some of his big boy vocabulary in there, telling her about his adventures with 'Untle Tarl' in the 'orch' (they picked 'appas' together, according to Finley).

You scolded Finley when he said a certain four letter word starting with 'f', Finn just laughing, knowing that his uncle Arthur most likely taught him it (you had walked into Linda and Arthur's once and caught Arthur encouraging Finley to swear — "Come on, Finley, say 'fuck' and I'll give you a chocolate!" "...Buck." "Close enough, mate.")

"We'll get through this," You told your husband, who nodded, but you weren't sure how you would or how long it was going to take.

You just knew that you'd get through it somehow.

•••

Thomas and Polly approached the group gathered in Charlie's yard.

"Happy birthday, Poll," Finn greeted, giving his aunt roses and a kiss on the cheek.

He then fished around in his pockets and gave her the box.

"From (Y/N) and the rest," He said, then stepped away from Polly, and Curly approached her.

"You grow grand in the horse shit, Poll," He congratulated in his own little way.

"Curly, pour some beer, aye?" Tommy asked, and Curly scuttled off to do it.

"The train to London leaves in an hour. Arthur, Michael, you're coming with me," Tommy said, trying to light his smoke.

"Tommy, I have to take Gina to the hospital today." Michael interjected, and Finn tried not to roll his eyes.

"A week ago, three members of our family were killed by Jimmy McCavern. The man we're going to speak to in London is establishing a relationship with Jimmy McCavern," Tommy took the beer that Curly offered, "So, cancel your appointments, and Ada can take Gina to the hospital."

Isiah bristled at this information, and Finn put a hand on his shoulder. He wanted to go with them too, but he knew that it wasn't the right time, or that he wasn't the best man for it.

"'Cause that's what women do," Arthur added, making Isiah scoff as he took a draw from his cigarette.

"Clean that shit off your shoes before you get in me car, aye?" Tommy told his cousin, taking a puff of his own cigarette.

Michael looked at him in a way that said that he wasn't impressed with his older cousin.

"Michael, they will give it and give it until your case is proven, and then they'll take it. From you, but mainly from me." Polly said, looking at her son, then at her nephew.

"Polly, you go to the hospital and speak to Aberama Gold. You tell him there is a strategy in place to avenge the death of his son and daughter, so not to do anything rash. And take with you the heartfelt condolences of the whole family," Tommy instructed his aunt, making Isiah frown.

Isiah knew Tommy meant his words, that he was truly sorry that Esmeralda and Bonnie had died, but couldn't the man say it with a bit more emotion?

"Why me?" Polly questioned as Tommy took a sip of his beer.

"Because Aberama Gold is in love with you. He even got an haircut," Tommy replied, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world, "And the smell of your perfume might help ease his pain."

Finn's mind drifted to you teasing him about Aberama being his 'favourite uncle', and he fought the urge to snicker.

"Tommy, I'm forty-five years old today." Polly informed her nephew, clearly not having it.

"Forty-five years old and still breaking hearts, eh?" Tommy said, and Arthur said a 'yeah' in agreement.

"To Polly," Tommy announced, raising his glass.

Everyone else followed suit, raising a toast for the matriarch of the family.

"Curly, organise two wagons to take the souls of Esmeralda and Bonnie Gold's souls to heaven," Tommy commanded, and Curly nodded, "Isiah, fetch his boxing gloves from the gym to burn with his body. Grab anything from your house that Esmeralda would want gone up in the smoke with her."

"Ezzie," Isiah muttered softly, knowing how much his wife hated being called by her full name.

Finn clapped Isiah on the shoulder, and led his best mate to his car, not wanting to leave him alone.

•••

You bounced Rosalie and Bonnibel on your knees as you read them a story, the boys drawing on a piece of paper with Dorothy. A car pulled up outside, and the dogs started barking. Finn Junior hopped up onto the bay window seat to see who it was.

Dottie walked over to the window to see who it was.

"Mary Bone and her baby," She announced, and grabbed the girls off of you, allowing to go and answer the door and tell the dogs to stop barking.

Mary came up the walk, the setting sun making her look all the more gorgeous, cradling a baby wrapped in a purple blanket. You welcomed her in, and ushered her to the kitchen, putting on the kettle for the pair of you.

"Is this bubby then? Oh, gorgeous!" You cooed, and she chuckled, turning the baby in her arms so you could see them better.

"Her name is Cara," Mary stated, and you cooed even more, telling her how pretty and romantic her name sounded.

"She's going to be a heartbreaker when she gets older," You said jokingly, going and grabbing two teacups and putting sugar and teabags in them.

"Hope not — I hope she'll be like her father, falling in love with the one woman and staying with her," Mary replied, and you grinned at her.

"Who's the father? You didn't tell me you were in love!" You complained, going and grabbing the biscuits from the pantry.

"I'm not the one he's in love with," Mary admitted, and you clucked your tongue sympathetically.

"Oh, Mary. Any man would be lucky to have you," You consoled, and grabbed the chocolate you stashed earlier, then going and sitting back across from her, snapping it in half and giving her the big piece.

She took it gratefully, and you pulled over Jeremy and Bon-Bon's stroller, Mary setting Cara down in it after you reclined the back of it. You got up and poured the now boiled water into the teacups, and milk, then carried them back over to the table, setting Mary's down in front of her.

"I didn't just pop around for a visit," Mary said as you settled back into your own chair.

"Oh?" You asked, confused, looking over at the woman as she rocked her child back and forth in the pram.

You picked up your teacup and took a sip.

"Cara; she's," Mary began, but paused, then sighed, looking away from you, "She's Finn's."

You gasped, and your grip on your teacup loosened, sending it clattering onto the table, sending lukewarm liquid pouring across the table and into your lap.

"What?" You questioned, your voice quiet, eyes narrowed at the woman across from you.

"She's Finn's," Mary repeated, still not looking at you.

"How dare you," You said through gritted teeth, standing up and making you way around the table to her, stopping in front of her.

She still didn't look at you.

"As if Finn would touch the likes of you — He has a wife. My husband would never," You spat, "And the next time you accuse my husband of that shit, you look me square in the eye."

Mary looked at you, and smirked, "Well then maybe you don't really know your husband, because on those nights you'd stay home while he and Isiah were out drinkin', he'd come and seek me out, and we'd head to darkest corners of the bar."

You scoffed, rolling your eyes as you picked up the teacup in front of Mary.

"I'm serious, (Y/N)." Mary continued, standing up, following you across the room to the sink, "He wanted to feel the touch of a real woman. One he wasn't forced to marry."

"Well, he seems to enjoy my touch, we've got three kids to show for it," You snarked, not missing a beat, turning to face Mary, "And you'd hardly be able to call yourself a real woman after saying you slept with my husband."

"Oh, but I am," She replied, feeling terribly bold, "See, the difference between me and you, (Y/N), is that you're a girl, and I'm a woman. You dress yourself in whatever's fashionable, change with the trends you know, you paint your nails silly colours-"

"Yellow's my favourite colour," You interjected quietly, looking down at your now cracked nail polish.

"-And you're still graceless. Awkward. However, I, the proper woman I am, I don't keep up with the styles. I dress in clothes that suit me and my body, I don't change just because something new is in style it all cycles back anyway, I paint my nails sensible colours, not childish yellow, of all things, and I have grace only you — and other little girls — could dream of," Mary finished, and you looked down at the ground.

What she said was true. She was five years your senior, three years Finn's senior. She was Ezzie's friend first, but got roped into your friend group easily. You never got on with her as well as the others, just because of your age difference, and partly because you were jealous of her.

She never walked into a room, she floated, her dress billowing around her, she never talked, she chimed, her voice sounds so angelic that it would be a crime to say she just talked, and every move she made was so precise, so calculated, that you'd think she was dancing. She never missed a beat, stepped out of formation. She was perfect, in every sense of the word.

Now that you were thinking about it, Finn could've slept with her. You wouldn't blame your husband, either, if you were single and she swung your way you'd try to bed her without hesitation.

She was gorgeous. You doubted her story of her sleeping with Finn a little less now.

"Here's what we're going to do," You said abruptly, wanting to stop your train of thought before it got worse, "We're going to get a blood test, to see if the baby has a blood type that could make her Finn's daughter. If she does happen to have a blood type that could make her my husband's daughter, then we're going to get Polly Gray to do paternity test. Our way. The gypsy way."

Mary nodded.

"If, and that's a big if, Cara is Finn's daughter, then I'll make sure you get money. I'm bad but I'm not fucking cruel," You reassured her, then dipped your finger in her tea.

After finding that it was lukewarm, no longer boiling hot, you threw it on her, the soggy teabag hitting her square in the face.

"Now, you absolute harlot, get the fuck out of my house before I grab a knife from the drawer and stab you with it," You threatened, placing the teacup into the sink, and she nodded, scurrying across the room and picking up her daughter, then hurrying out of your house.

You watched her leave out the window, and sighed, going over to the table and packing everything up, washing up the teacups and wiping up the spilt tea with a wet rag. You sniffled as you did so.

"Fuck Mary Bone, fuck her and her being so fuckable — and fuck anyone else who looked at my husband!" You ranted to the four walls as you scrubbed at the floor violently, then threw the rag up into the sink.

You were too mad to cheer when it made it in.

"Dot, you alright in there? I just need a minute!" You called out, your voice cracking as you did so.

"Yeah, they're all getting tired now, you're right!" Dorothy hollered back, packing up some of the toys the kids were using.

You thanked God that you had a friend like Dot, then the phone rang. You sprung up to answer it.

"Hello?" You croaked, and winced at how bad you sounded.

"(Y/N)! Baby!" Finn shouted, and you sighed, knowing your husband was probably off his face on booze and snow, "Solve an argument between me and Billy here, yeah? Now, when you mop, you - you vacuum the floors first, right?"

"Yes, Finn, you vacuum the floors first," You huffed, wiping your eyes with the back of your hand.

Finn whooped over the other side of the phone, "I told him that! Hey — you don't sound too good. D'ya need me home?"

"I'm fine, you stay out," You reassured your husband, not wanting him to come home yet.

"Okay. Love you, see ya when I lay eyes on ya next," Finn said, then hung up the phone before you could even reply.

You tsked, and sighed, heading out of the kitchen and up to your room to change clothes.

•••

Finn stumbled into the stables, to the cot you always had set up for him when he came home shitfaced. He woke up still drunk this morning, so he decided that it was best to sleep it off  before going to you and the kids. He had to tell you that Tommy wanted Billy to stay with you and him, so he could keep an eye on the man.

Finn heard someone clear their throat, and he looked up. You were sat on the cot, an unimpressed look on your face.

"Hi," Finn greeted quietly, and you gestured to the bale of hay next to you.

He went and sat there, confused. Usually you'd just leave him be.

"Finn, in ten days' time, you're getting a blood test because Mary Bone came here yesterday and said that her new baby was yours," You told your husband, not wanting to beat around the bush.

"What?" Finn asked, feeling dread creep up inside of him.

"She said you slept with her, and that her child is yours," You repeated, looking at your husband, "She's wrong though, isn't she?"

Finn studied your poker face, and shrugged, making your jaw drop.

"I'm fairly sure she's not," He said hurriedly, "But I'm usually too shitfaced to remember anything."

"Finn Theo Shelby!" You thundered, "If you got her up the duff I'm taking the kids on the road!"

Finn stood up, albeit with a struggle.

"You can't do that to my kids!" He protested, and you scoffed.

"I can and I will," You challenged, "I've got more right over them than you do, and you know it."

Finn stayed silent, mulling over your words.

"And if you have a problem with it, then you should go to Tommy, although I don't think Tommy would care about it," You snapped, and Finn looked utterly wounded.

You touched a nerve. You knew it.

"Get out," Finn hissed, and, instead of apologising, you plumped Finn's pillow and walked out of the barn, leaving your husband there in his misery.

§§§

Hi guys, please please PLEASE go share my pinned post, it’s a GoFundMe to help me escape homelessness & DV 🫶🏽

Love y'all ❤️

- Sunflower x

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CONTRARY - FINN SHELBY X READER; PART 17

PUBLISHED: 02/06/2022

!!FIRST PART HERE!!

Part 1

MASTERLIST

READER'S POV

We cheered and passed the bottle of gin around as Goliath and Bonnie exchanged punches.

I watched as Bonnie sat back down in his corner, blood pouring down his face. Surely it would've stung. I caught his eye and he winked and grinned. I poked my tongue out. He was fine.

I realised that it was now the fourth round and grinned like a Cheshire Cat as the bell rang, signalling the start of the round. Bonnie hopped back up, and headed across the canvas, meeting Goliath in the middle.

I noticed Tommy and Arthur gone from their spots across from us.

"Polly," I began, catching the attention of the woman next to me, "Where are your nephews?"

She followed my gaze across the room and noticed them gone. She frowned, then got up.

"Stay in your seats, don't move," She instructed the rest of us, then strutted off.

I looked back across the room, catching Finn's eye.

"I'm gonna go see Finn," I mumbled to Lizzie, standing up and trying to ignore the pit in my stomach.

I walked around the ring, and in between the empty seats, sitting on Finn's lap.

"Do you know where your brothers are?" I asked him as quietly as I could, eyes back on the fight as I tried to drown out the screaming men around us.

It was loud in here. Loud enough that if someone hit the floor in another part of the building you wouldn't hear it.

"No," Finn replied, and I moved to get up, but he grabbed my waist, holding me in place.

I felt him shift restlessly under me, then stop as he gripped my waist tighter, and shifted me back so my back was flush with his chest, wrapping his forearm around my waist to keep me there.

I could feel the tension coming off of him in waves, and decided not to move. He'd probably pull me right back down anyway.

"If I have to move from this spot tonight, I want you to stay here, where there's people around you." Finn commanded, his breath hot in my ear.

"Come on, Bonnie boy! Bonnie, come on, kill him!" I heard dad call out, and Bonnie moved his arms from his face and started punching Goliath, moving forward and backing him into the ropes, landing a good hit each time.

"Come on, Bon, you can do this!" I called out, and Bonnie moved to knock Goliath out, uppercutting him then giving him a left hook which sent him right into the canvas.

I cheered for my brother, standing up and clapping, Finn doing the same behind me. Bonnie did a lap of the ring, then jumped up onto a corner, and the cheering in the room got even louder.

Dad came over and lifted him up, scurrying across the ring and putting him in the corner next to the one he was standing in.

I felt Finn move behind me, so I looked over and saw Tommy, no Arthur or Polly with him. He grabbed Finn and pulled him close, whispering in his ear.

Finn looked shocked as Tommy patted him on the chest and walked off. Finn sunk back into his chair, and put his head in his hands.

"Finn?" I questioned, getting no answer.

I knelt down in front of him, turning back to see Polly across the room, sitting next to a crying Linda.

"Is it to do with Arthur?" I asked the sandy haired boy in front of me, him nodding as he pulled his hands away from his face.

"Arthur's dead." Finn croaked, making my jaw drop.

"Oh, Finn," I began, reaching up to touch his face, but he slapped my hand away, tapping Isiah and whispering in his ear, then walking off, Isiah trailing behind him.

"Now I proper look like a whore," I grumbled as I followed the pair, dusting the dirt off my dress, and kicking off my shoes so they wouldn't clack against the floor.

Anyone would think I'd be sucking someone off with all the dirt around my knees from that fucking floor.

I headed down the same blue corridor we had been in earlier that night, and there was no sign of the boys anywhere.

There was a man I didn't know at the other end of the hallway. I gasped, and he perked up, turning around, only a cord in his hand.

He rushed me before I could get my gun out, wrapping the cord around my neck.

I leaned back into him, then jumped, sending him and I backwards as I threw him off balance. He hit his head hard on the floor, his chest cushioning mine, and I scrambled away from him, undoing the clasp on my purse and pulling out my gun, aiming it at him.

"Move and I'll decorate this fuckin' corridor with your brains." I hissed, and heard someone yell my name.

Finn. He came running, and put a hand on the small of my back, rubbing small circles, holding his own gun and aiming it at the Italian. I put mine back into my purse.

"I thought I told you not to move!" Finn snapped, "This doesn't fucking look like staying still, (Y/N)!"

"I was fine," I protested, conveniently leaving out the part where the man had a cord around my neck.

"You got lucky!" Finn hissed, "You could've died, like Arthur, or something else could've happened to you, because something always does when someone else isn't with you, and that's why I'm always up your arse, because that way I know you're safe, but if you don't stay with me or people you trust, you might not be safe, do you understand?"

I looked at the panting boy, and opened my mouth to reply then shut it again as I realised he was right. At the wedding, I was alone when Mum cornered me, at Watery Lane, I was alone when the Italians kidnapped me, and tonight I was alone when the man wrapped the cord around my neck.

"Fucking hell," Isiah breathed as he entered the corridor, then searched the man, finding a wire in his pocket.

I heard shoes up the beginning of the hallway, and looked up, Tommy approaching us.

"Tommy! We got the other wop," Isiah stated, then showed him the wire, "Cunt had a wire in his pocket."

Tommy was silent as he reached us, hitting the Italian across the head with the butt of his gun, sending him to the ground. I stepped away from Finn, standing on the other side of the hallway for breathing space as Tommy started kicking the man, making us flinch. He then moved away, looking at Finn.

"Right in the ribs," I advised as I gave him a little shove forward.

"Go on, Finn!" Isiah encouraged as Finn shifted from foot to foot, "Go on, Finn!"

Finn got in and started assaulting the man, but nowhere near as aggressive as Tommy was, nearly hesitant.

Isiah leaned down and grabbed the man, holding him, down.

"Take his eyes, Finn," Tommy commanded, "Do it for Arthur."

Finn looked up at Tommy then down at the man, seeming unsure.

"Take his fucking eyes!" Tommy yelled at his brother, making Finn take off his cap and get the razor out.

"You can do it, Finn." I muttered, and that was all it took for him to move forward and pierce the man's eyes with the razor blade, moving it across his eye, making him scream, then doing the other, making blood spurt up onto his cheek.

Tommy walked away before Finn even finished taking the second eye. Bastard.

Isiah moved to follow Tommy, leaving Finn and I alone, bar the man on the floor.

"You did good," I said to Finn, reaching up and wiping the blood from his cheek.

He leaned out of my reach and stormed off.

"Finn!" I called out as I followed him.

He walked past the ring and out of the door. I picked up my dress so the hem wouldn't get dirtied by the floor as I jogged to keep up with him.

"It isn't fucking safe out here; let's go back. There could be Italians crawling around out here," I suggested, putting a hand on his arm.

He yanked it out of my grip, and continued walking in silence down the sidewalk to our car, where he got in, and didn't even wait for me to do so before starting it and driving off.

My jaw went slack, and I heard gunshots sound in the building where the boxing match was being held, so I wasn't keen on going back in there. I pulled my own gun out of my purse, and stood flush against the wall, waiting for someone I knew to exit the building. I'd have been better off staying inside. The gown I was wearing was light, and wouldn't blend in with any of the buildings. If any enemies came along, I'd be fucked.

"Trouble in paradise?" A voice to my left asked, and I aimed my gun at them, then turned to look at who it was.

"Alfie Solomons." I greeted, putting my gun down, "Arthur's just been killed, but you'd know that if you stayed inside and watched the fight."

"I don't watch." Alfie said simply, walking up to me, his cane making a small noise every time it hit the concrete.

"Now, princess, seeing how your carriage has prematurely turned into a pumpkin, meaning fucking took off without you, can I be so kind to drive  you home?" Alfie offered.

"Only you and I in the car?" I questioned eyeing him up.

He nodded, "You can even hold the gun if it makes you feel better."

"I want to drive." I stated, making him look at me funny.

"You could crash us, I'm driving!" Alfie protested, making me raise my gun again, "Okay, you can drive."

He passed me his keys, and I gave a triumphant grin as he pointed out his car.

•••

After speeding from Camden Town to Birmingham, I got to my apartment in one piece, thanking Solomons for the ride.

When I got in Finn's door was shut. I noticed a bottle of whiskey gone from the liquor cupboard. I went and changed into pyjamas, opened window the tiniest bit, grabbed the bin from the bathroom, and my keys.

We both had a copy of each other's car keys, a key for the front door, a key for the door to our own rooms, as well as a copy of the key to the other's room, only to be used in emergencies.

I unlocked the door, and Finn was curled up under the blankets, only his face poking out, eyes red and puffy, and tear tracks down his cheeks. Finn Junior followed me into the room, heading over to his cat bed.

Finn watched me as I placed the bucket next to the bed, and went and sat at his feet. He took a swig of the whiskey, eyes still on me. His clothes were strewn around the room, and his wardrobe had a dent in the door that I was sure wasn't there before.

"I'm not moving," I informed him, wrapping my arms around the post next to me.

He sat up against the headboard, and held an arm out to me, and that was all it took for me to crawl up into his grip, sliding under the blankets with him. He put the cap on the whiskey, placing it on the bedside table, and shifted around so he was laying down instead of sat up with me, his head on my stomach and arms around my waist. I tentatively reached up and ran my fingers through his hair. He leaned into my grip, closing his eyes.

"Here, sit up for a bit," I commanded, and he did so.

I laid down, and pulled him down with me, letting him rest his head on my chest. We shifted silently until we were both comfortable. One of his arms was across my midriff, and the other was up under his currently unused pillow. Both of mine were around him.

"I like this pillow." Finn mumbled sleepily, nuzzling his face against me as I began playing with his hair again, making me chuckle.

I felt something wet hit my chest, and heard him sniffle, which sent a pang through my stomach. Poor boy.

"I'm here," I comforted, rubbing his back and he wrapped his hand in the clothes covering my midriff, gripping them tightly.

"Arthur left," Finn murmured, barely awake, making me nod, "He went to war, then came back, then went to the countryside with the boys, and Ada went to London and aunt Poll moved. Everyone left. You gon' leave me too?"

"If I leave I'll drag you along with me," I told the boy, who gave a sleepy grin.

Finn Junior hopped up on the bed and stood on the blankets next to Finn, tapping him with his paw concernedly.

"He's fine," I told the cat, who gave a pleased mewl and came and laid on the other side of me.

I traced shapes on Finn's back until I heard him quietly snore, and only then did I allow myself to fall asleep.

§§§

I live for clingy Finn

also why is ao3 so fiddly I just want to publish Contrary there as well someone pls help lmao

Love y'all ❤️

- Sunflower x

NEXT PART

Part 18

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CONTRARY - FINN SHELBY X READER; PART 28

PUBLISHED: 23/06/2022

!!FIRST PART HERE!!

Part 1

MASTERLIST

TAGLIST

THIRD PERSON'S POV

Your husband leaned down, breath hot on your ear as he promised to be back soon. You gave a hum of acknowledgement and continued talking to one of Tommy's friends in high places. What Tommy brought you and Finn to this dinner party for, you didn't know. Tommy was bringing his new business partners (Bonnie, your father, and your sisters) to meet some of his uppity friends over a dinner party, therefore the senior Shelbys were in attendance as they all had important positions in the company, but you and Finn weren't senior Shelbys. If you were being honest, you and Finn didn't even have proper positions in the company, just doing whatever bits and bobs Tommy told you to do. You supposed it made sense, but also didn't make sense at the same time.

Finn handed you his glass of whiskey, and walked off, happy to be out of that damned room but feeling slightly guilty for leaving you alone.

He headed towards the nearest bathroom, wanting a few moments of privacy to settle his nerves — and to play in the snow.

He knocked twice on the bathroom door, and no answer came. He tried the door but it was locked, making him frown. He hoped that no one was inside and unconscious. He put his ear up to the door and knocked again.

A faint, sniffly 'hello?' came through, making his heart drop. He knew that voice anywhere. Saoirse.

"Sersh, it's Finn. Can you open the door?" Finn asked, trying to sound calm.

She should have been well and truly snoring by now, tucked safely into bed, under the watch of her nanny, who Bonnie was so generously paying for.

Finn heard the door lock jiggle, then the door opened just enough for Saoirse to slip through and hug Finn in a bone crushing hug. He quickly wrapped his own arms around the child, rubbing her back comfortingly, her nightgown smooth under his hand.

"I got scared because it was a new room and I was going to ask Pippa for a nightlight because the shadows looked scary but I couldn't remember if she went right or left or what bell to ring to call her and I tried to find her but I couldn't and I ended up in there," Saoirse explained through sniffles, breathing quick and shallow, "She does it a lot but she usually puts a light on so I'm not scared."

"I'm here now," Finn reassured, making a mental note to tell Bonnie to get rid of that nanny.

Saoirse nodded, breathing still uneven.

"Take a few big, deep breaths — like this," Finn demonstrated, then gestured for Saoirse to do it.

Saoirse did so, clinging on to Finn as she did it, as if she was scared he was going to run away as soon as she turned her back.

Finn waited patiently until Saoirse was calm, then pulled his handkerchief out and told her to blow her nose with it, and she did. He suddenly heard the rapid 'click-click' that your heels made when you walked. He spun around, and you were hurrying over to the pair, dress bunched up in your hands so you wouldn't trip over it.

"What's she doing here? She was meant to be back at camp with Pippa," You said softly, giving her a hug and leaning down to place a kiss on her forehead.

"She just said that Pippa put her into one of the guest rooms," Finn replied, reminding himself to unclench his jaw, trying to keep himself standing in a relaxed way so Saoirse wouldn't see how stressed he was becoming.

"Fucking — I knew she was mad on that butler, wouldn't think she would do that to my sister because of it," You grumbled, frowning, "She'd be better off fucking living with us, honest."

"That can be arranged," Finn said, making you stop and look at him.

"That isn't a five second decision!" You hissed, not wanting to get Saoirse's hopes up.

Finn nodded, taking off his jacket and placing it around your sister, who must have been cold in her little blue nightgown.

"Want to stay with us tonight, at our house?" You asked Saoirse gently.

She nodded, wiping her eyes with the sleeve of Finn's jacket.

Finn handed you the car keys, "You go put her in the car, I'll go tell Tommy."

You nodded, and Finn turned on his heel and went to go find his brother.

You were concerned. You had gotten Saoirse a nanny so she wouldn't be left alone, with all of you going and doing business most of the day. Your father and Bonnie having a bit of an erratic schedule making it hard for them to be home, and Ezzie was usually in town with Isiah making lesson plans for the kids so they could learn too, which, knowing her, could easily turn into a night over at Isiah's house. That was where Pippa came in useful, caring for your sister when you all couldn't, but now you were wondering how many times Pippa actually left your sister alone and unsupervised.

By tomorrow, Pippa would be lucky if she had her eyes.

You walked down the corridor and turned to your right, holding Saoirse's hand, then heard a giggle. You looked to your left, and, there was your brother, talking to one of the butlers, a smirk on his face.

"Bonnie!" You said sharply, making him look at you and drop his smirk.

"What's she doing up?" He asked you, shoving the butler into the room and closing the door behind him, walking over to the pair of you.

"The nanny you hired has been leaving her unattended," You explained, making Bonnie's eyes widen.

"What about the dogs, her dogs, Daisy and Duke, don't they stay with her?" Bonnie questioned, reaching an arm out for Saoirse, who shook her head and pressed herself into your side even more.

"That's not the point-" You began, but Bonnie cut you off,

"-We always had the dogs and no babysitters-"

"Yes but we were older and we had each other, she's got no one, we're not camping with family now!" You snapped, and Bonnie pursed his lips and nodded, seeing your point.

You sighed, ushering Saoirse along the corridor and promising to see Bonnie sometime soon, when he wasn't busy.

•••

A week after Pippa was fired — and you took her eyes, cheered on by Finn — you sat with Finn, Saoirse, Ezzie, Aberama, and Bonnie at your dining table, Finn Junior on Saoirse's lap.

You drummed your fingertips against the tabletop, your nails clicking against it. Finn found the noise irritating, so he clamped his hand around yours and brought it back between the pair of you, giving it three quick squeezes

Saoirse's eyes went from you and Finn, to Aberama, and back again. You noticed that she hadn't even taken a sip of her tea, or had a biscuit. Nervous. She felt nervous.

"You can choose whatever you want, my darling Butterfly," Aberama said in a reassuring tone, smiling fatherly down at his youngest child.

Butterfly. Saoirse had finally picked a favourite colour. Blue.

"Want to stay with Bee and Finn for a bit," Saoirse admitted, making you freeze, "See what it's like."

Your husband noticed this and dropped his hand, rubbing your leg in a reassuring manner.

"We'll give you my room," Finn told Saoirse, making her grin, "And enrol her in school today, we've got time."

Saoirse's grin dropped, and she looked over at you.

"You're going if you're staying here," You told her, and she huffed, hugging Finn Junior and rubbing her face against his fur, but protested no more.

The only options were school, or a nanny, and you didn't want to hire a nanny after that last incident. You could have gotten her a governess, but you wanted her to have some interaction with other children.

Aberama looked at you and your husband. He noticed that your hair was down, which was unusual. You rarely had it down anymore. A big change from when you first got married and rarely had it up. Maybe it was a sign of growing up. He wished you had your hair down more if it was.

"We'll need to get her clothes from my vardo sometime soon, then," Aberama said softly, making you nod, the check the time.

You still had time to enrol her today.

"I've got to go see Tommy, I'll see you two back at camp," Bonnie said, standing up from the table and wiping the nonexistent dust from his clothes.

"And I've got to go and make schooling packs, I don't know when I'll be back at camp," Ezzie excused herself, Bonnie pulling her chair out and helping her stand up.

Your father wordlessly stood up, and tucked his chair in. You frowned. He always said see you later before standing up from his chair, then once again whilst leaving.

"Dad? What's wrong?" You asked carefully, not wanting to upset him.

"You're all growing so fast, at the start of the year I had you all with me but now you're all going and growing up," Aberama admitted, making you feel slightly guilty.

You didn't see your father as much as you wanted now that you lived with Finn.

"I'll never grow up," Saoirse piped up, making you all chuckle.

"Maybe all of your kids should spend one last night in camp with you — not one last night, but just one night together before Sersh comes to stay with us for a bit," Finn suggested, making your heart flutter.

He could be proper considerate sometimes.

"Yes, tonight," Ezzie agreed, and looked at Bonnie, who grinned and nodded.

"It's settled then," You stated, looking at your father who looked more upbeat than he did before.

"Tonight," He nodded, grinning from ear to ear, "I'll see you, you'd do well to get Saoirse enrolled today."

You hummed in agreement as you stood up from the table, taking the empty cups to the sink, Finn getting up and helping you.

Your sister, father, and brother moved towards the door, saying see you later, then left you, your husband, your cat, and your younger sister in the apartment. Saoirse was finally eating her biscuits and drinking her tea.

Finn walked over and phoned Poll, who agreed to go for a drive and get him the enrolment forms and help him fill them out, no questions asked. That's what he liked about Polly. Always doing things for the people she loved.

"Finn, she won't be where she's supposed to be up to in school, what if she gets bullied?" You asked your husband lowly as you stood next to him at the sink, looking over at your shoulder quickly, peeking at your sister.

She picked up things quick, being a kid, but you were sure she wasn't where she needed to be, and you knew just how vicious kids were.

"Then we'll pay someone to get her up to speed in the afternoons," Finn reassured you, leaning down and planting a kiss on your forehead, then grabbed the tea towel and started wiping up.

Finn listened to your soft humming as you moved around the room, and headed down the hallway to his room. You were probably beginning to move his clothes into your room. Neither of you had much clothes, so you'd be fine sharing your wardrobe and chest of drawers with him.

"Finny?" Saoirse's voice snapped him back to reality, and he spun around, raising his eyebrows and jerking his chin up.

"Can I get a nightlight for a bit?" She asked, shifting in her seat.

"Of course," Finn reassured, "We'll track one down after we get your enrolment form."

Saoirse grinned toothily at this statement, then put the cat down, walking over and laying in front of the fireplace, which was roaring. Even though it was getting warmer, it was still cold in the apartment, especially in the rooms. Finn wouldn't mind having a place that had a fireplace in each room. Maybe an extras room, too, so no one would have to move rooms in case guests came.

"Need help!" You called out, and Finn moved down the hallway, then backtracked, turning on the radio and finding a station for Saoirse, then moving down the corridor again.

He walked into his — now Saoirse's — room, and saw that you had all of his clothes out on his bed.

"What do you need help with?" He asked as he leaned against the doorway.

"Darling, can you take those ironed clothes and put them where ever you want them? I'll take these and put them wherever they'll fit," You said, and Finn felt his heart skip a beat at the pet name.

"That I can do, love," Finn said, crossing the room and grabbing the ironed stuff by their hangers, then walking them into your — his, now, too — rooms, going and putting them into the wardrobe, noticing his list for you pinned on the door.

He noticed the heart shaped rock on your vanity, and beamed a smile.

"What's got you smiling?" You questioned as you went and put Finn's folded clothes into your chest of drawers.

"The rock," Finn admitted, blushing, making you chuckle as you stood up, then crossed the room, leaning up and planting a kiss on his cheek.

He wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you into a hug. He took a deep breath in, and caught your scent, making his shoulders drop in relaxation. Your scent always calmed him.

"It's going to be odd, sharing a room," You said, but felt excited.

You'd be sharing a room with your husband, finally. The thought of waking up, tangled in the sheets with Finn as the morning light filtered through your window made your heart beat just a little bit faster.

§§§

Heyyy long time no see

What did you think of this chapter??

Some of the events in this chapter was meant to happen in chapter 30 but oh well lol

Love y'all ❤️

- Sunflower x

NEXT PART

Part 29

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CONTRARY - FINN SHELBY X READER; PART 2

PUBLISHED: 15/05/2022

!!FIRST PART + MASTERLIST HERE!!

Part 1

MASTERLIST

FINN'S POV

Arthur was now dragging me down to the Garrison. Apparently (Y/N) and her elder sister Esmeralda were there, waiting for us. Fuck 'em. I didn't want to see any of those Golds, especially the one Arthur told me I had to marry. This would be the first time I'd be seeing you properly.

"Why the fuck are we meeting at the Garrison? She's too young to drink anyway," I complained as Arthur fixed my suit as we walked down the cobblestone streets, feeling slightly buzzed from my whiskey.

"She can drink if she wants, I wouldn't be surprised if she could drink you under the table - and behave, you're going to be tied to this girl until one of you die because Shelby's. Don't. Divorce." Arthur warned before we walked in.

Arthur strutted in, and I followed, automatically reaching up to touch the bottom of the door jamb, then we walked to our private booth, passing Harry and saying hey on the way.

You were there, looking out the open window, your hair shielding you from my gaze (and Arthur's), your hand near your mouth. From the soft 'click', it was safe to assume you were chewing your nails.

I closed the door and locked it behind me, making sure no one could enter. Your sister nudged you, saying something softly, making you tuck your hair behind your ears and look at us. Your eyes met mine,  and breath caught in my throat. The sun coming through the window made your eyes look like they were glowing.

You scowled, then faced the window again.

Arthur ushered me into the chair and I slid across, stopping next to the window. I immediately started bouncing my leg. Arthur sat down next to me, saying greetings. Esmeralda replied, but not you.

"Have they organised a date for the wedding yet?" Esmeralda asked Arthur, her eyes flickering to me and back.

"Sometime next week, I suspect. Don't worry, we'll get a seamstress to sew her up a nice dress." Arthur reassured the pair of you — mainly Esmeralda.

"I don't want a white dress," You spoke, turning to look at Arthur, "I like yellow — I want yellow. If I'm going to get married against my fucking will, It's it going be in my favourite fucking colour."

Arthur nodded thoughtfully, "That can easily be arranged."

You settled back into your seat, looking somewhat content at the little say you had, "Good."

We fell into an awkward silence.

"I'll go get us some drinks," Esmeralda said, slipping out of the chair and out of the booth.

Arthur shifted uncomfortably as you openly glared at us now that your sister was gone.

"I hate you both," You announced, then looked back out the window.

I opened my mouth to say something back but Arthur raised his eyebrows at me. I quickly shut my mouth, knowing he would tell Tommy.

Esmeralda quickly came back in, a jug of beer and four glasses on a tray. Arthur flew up to help her set the tray on the table without breaking anything.

"Have they  told you of your new living arrangements?" Esmeralda asked her sister as she poured her a glass.

You shook your head slowly. I perked up in my seat as Arthur slid me a glass, wondering what was going to happen. Esmeralda nodded towards Arthur.

Arthur pointed to himself, and Esmeralda nodded. You cocked a brow as you crossed your arms over your chest.

Arthur cleared his throat and shifted uncomfortably, leaning his arms on the tabletop, "You're moving to Watery Lane — with Finn. Orders of Tommy and your father. You're expected to move as soon as possible."

Your jaw dropped, as did mine.

"Fuck off!" You said at the same time I whipped out my pocket flask and took a long, hard swig of the whiskey.

This was the first I was hearing about it.

You stood up and stepped up onto the chair, then the table. You kicked the jug, effectively shattering it, making us all shout. Drops of beer landed on the yellow ribbon intertwined with your shoelaces, but you didn't seem to care as you walked down the table and hopped down onto the ground, and walked out of the booth.

"I'm sorry," Esmeralda said hurriedly as she got up and followed you.

Quite a fucking exit, if I do say so myself.

•••

READER'S POV

I locked myself in my vardo, this time I was adamant about not coming out. This was my home, not some cobblestone street where all the houses looked the same.

"(Y/N)! Get out here, girl!" Dad called out, knocking on the door again for what must have been the eighth time in two hours, "I'll tow this fucking vardo into Watery Lane if I must!"

The thought of my precious home touching that filthy street made me blanch, so I quickly got up off my bed and stepped across the van to the door, taking a deep breath in through my nose and letting it out of my mouth before I swung the door open.

There stood Dad and none other than Tommy and Finn Shelby. I grimaced at the trio. Finn didn't have his cap on, the sun shining freely on his face. I could see the freckles spread across his pale skin. Tommy continued puffing on the cigarette hanging out of the corner of his mouth.

"What are you lot doing here?" I asked, leaning against the doorframe.

"Finn's staying the night with you, so hand over your weapons." Dad ordered, stepping past me and grabbing my rifle and knife, "Tommy was kind enough to let you have one last night in the vardo."

My jaw dropped once more. He couldn't be serious! I looked at Finn, who looked away.

Oh, he was very fucking serious.

"We've decided you're to get married on Friday, five days' time — we'll do it here, at the camp, and you're going in to get your yellow dress on Tuesday, in two days' time. Sound alright?" Tommy questioned as Dad stepped back down the stairs.

I didn't have very much of a choice, did I?

"Sounds divine." I said through gritted teeth, making Tommy nod and walk off.

Finn stood there awkwardly, hands clasped around the black bag.

I stepped back and opened the door to the caravan wider, tilting my head to the side, "Take your boots off on the stairs. I don't want mud."

Finn handed me his bag, and I went and placed it on the table. He sat on the stairs, slowly unlacing his boots and removing them, then stood up and came in, reaching up and touching the top of the doorway as he did so, looking around.

I sat on my bed, watching him as he trailed a finger along the table and looked at the trinkets I collected at fairgrounds lined up on the shelf on top of the stove.

"So?" I asked, cocking a brow.

He turned to face me, looking confused.

"Do you like my caravan?" I elaborated impatiently, feeling slightly nervous.

He nodded, and I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding.

"It's nice, really — just not what I'm used to," He replied, settling himself down on the seat next to the bed.

His leg immediately started bouncing. We settled into an awkward silence, and I brought my hand up to my mouth out of habit, making Finn reach over and grab his bag. He rummaged around for a bit then threw a little packet onto the bed.

I looked at it, and opened it. Chewing gum.

"To save your poor nails," He explained as I ripped the foil off of a piece and popped it into my mouth.

I pulled another piece from the packet and threw it to him. He unwrapped it carefully and placed half of it into his mouth and bit down, then threw the remaining half into his mouth, chewing like a cow.

I opened the window above my bed wider, to let breeze in more. I could smell something cooking on the fire, probably soup and flatbread again.

"Erm, should we figure out who's doing what role in the wedding?" Finn asked, scratching the back of his neck, leg bouncing a bit faster.

"No, not now, not ever." I hissed, glaring at the boy.

Finn threw his arms up, "Fuck me, (Y/N), I'm just trying to make things easier on us!"

I scoffed in disbelief as Finn ran a hand over his face, "They're marrying us off together because it's for the good of our families, (Y/N), can't you do this for your family?"

I  closed my mouth, halfway through thinking of an insult, then opened it once more, "How will it help my family? I'm not doing it if it's not worth it, Shelby."

"I don't know, you can figure it out and we can make it happen. Tommy wants me to marry you because we could use a strong family like yours tied to us." Finn said, using his thumb to twirl the ring on his index finger around.

I thought for a bit.

"Can — can you keep the Lees away from us when we're passing through, keep it civil when we're camped close? Can you use Dad whenever you can? And can you promote Bonnie to the best of your ability?" I asked as the boy leaned back onto the seat.

Finn nodded, "I'll pass the message onto Tommy."

I thought about it for a bit, then narrowed my eyes at the boy, "How will it help me?"

"It doesn't, I think. I don't get many benefits either." Finn said softly.

I nearly felt sorry for him as I turned my head away to look out of my window, staying silent for a few moments.

"I'll do it for my family, don't think for one second that this is for you. And I sleep on the right side of the bed, with the window open. I can't stand a still room." I stated.

"Well, can we keep the curtains closed at night? I can't sleep with light." Finn informed me, making me groan and roll my eyes.

We weren't even properly married yet and I already hated it.

§§§

Chapter two done and dusted

Also - I find that Peaky Blinders continuity is a bit iffy, so I’m playing around with it, which in turn may make a few things feel funny time-wise.

Feedback is appreciated :))

Love y'all ❤️

- Sunflower x

NEXT PART

Part 3

CONTRARY - FINN SHELBY X READER; PART 24

PUBLISHED: 15/06/2022

!!FIRST PART HERE!!

Part 1

MASTERLIST

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READER'S POV

I sat with Lizzie in her office. She was training me to take over for her when she went on maternity leave.

I was also taking a correspondence course, where I was learning to type so I could do it without looking. She was teaching me too, which is what we were focusing on at this very moment.

A knock sounded on Lizzie's office door.

"Come in," She called out, and the door opened, revealing Saoirse, Charlie, and Billy, the latter holding a bunch of roses.

With Charlie holding his hand for support, Billy walked over and handed me the bouquet, a big grin on his face.

"Aunty Bee!" Billy said joyously as I picked him up and put him on my lap.

He was too little to say my actual name yet, so he called me my family nickname.

"For you, Aunt (N/N), from Uncle Finn," Charlie informed me as he headed over to Lizzie and gave her a cuddle, asking her how his little sister was.

I squeezed Billy and thanked him for bringing me the bouquet, making him giggle.

"They're for all of your efforts in training to be a secretary. And just cause Finn felt like it." Saoirse recited, then I put Billy down, watching as he toddled back over to Saoirse, then Charlie ran back out, Saoirse giggling as she shut the office door behind her.

I looked at the bouquet, running my finger over a soft petal.

"You're smiling," Lizzie pointed out, and I could hear the smile in her own voice.

"I hadn't noticed," I mused, placing the roses down next to the typewriter.

"How's it going with Finn?" Lizzie inquired as I copied what she already had on the sheet, trying not to look down at my hands as I pushed each key.

"Good." I replied simply, and it was.

"Give me a bit more than that, I want details!" Lizzie complained teasingly, grinning as she picked up her cup of tea.

"We jump each other's bones every night and only pretend to hate each other so you don't catch on to our passionate feelings for each other." I said matter-of-factly, making her snort at my lie.

"Come on," She begged, and I rolled my eyes, pulling my hands back from the typewriter, knowing that I wasn't going to get anymore practice done right now.

"It's good — We don't fight over petty things, he buys me gifts, as you can see, and I buy him gifts. He ends up in my bed more often than not, because we read a book together or just talk and he falls asleep there. I don't mind it. I don't hate him anymore. I like him — as a friend." I said, and she gave me a knowing look.

"I used to like Tommy as just a friend, and look where that got me," She replied, turning to the side.

Her bump was showing now, quite prominent. She was glowing. She only had two more months until she gave birth.

"I'm not going to end up like that!" I protested, but whether I meant pregnant or in love I wasn't sure.

Lizzie gave me a look that said she believed otherwise.

"Has he taken you on a date yet?" She asked, and I shook my head, making her gasp.

"Has Tommy taken you on a date yet?" I questioned, and she rolled her eyes but nodded, a soft smile appearing on her face.

"I'm not married to Tommy, though. You, however, are married to Finn, you should go out sometime." She reasoned, then sipped her tea.

"Ugh, fine. I'll tell him that you said that he needs to take me out, then." I threw my hands up in fake exasperation, but couldn't help the butterflies in my stomach as I thought about Finn taking me on a date.

Lizzie cheered, making me laugh as I put my fingers back on the keys. I quickly finished typing, with no errors this time.

I got up and stretched, going to stand next to Lizzie, grabbing my own cup of tea and taking a sip.

"How's it going with you," She asked, and I could hear the concerned undertone in her voice.

"Better," I answered, and it was true, "But I still feel unloved sometimes, even though I know I am and I deserve to be. By others and myself."

Lizzie gave me a sympathetic look. As a former whore I fully believed that she knew those feelings all too well.

"Do you tolerate yourself?" Lizzie inquired, and I snorted.

"Barely," Was my bitter reply.

"Well; you need to be neutral. Rome wasn't built in a day. It's not about saying that you're the kindest or anything like that, it's just about thinking about the small things, like how you say hello to everyone when you see them. And you've got to take notice of the little things too, not only what you do but what other people do for you. That way you won't get lost in your own head," Lizzie explained, making me nod, "But don't get too happy. Everyone's down sometimes."

I hummed in agreement.

"Shall we make a list?" Lizzie asked, sitting herself down in the chair in front of the desk gracefully, "I used to write down one thing for each person, but now I don't need to, because I know that I'm appreciated. And loved."

She caressed her bump on the last word, a smile finding its way onto her face. I 'awwed'. I wanted to be that happy, and I knew that it was attainable.

"I'll write down the names of everyone in the family, then," I replied, grabbing a spare piece of paper and a pen.

I had been focusing on typing too long. I needed a small break. I'd probably go seek out Finn after this, and go to lunch.

Dad - Always sits on the sides of couches in case I want to sit on the arm

Ezzie - Signed up for netball with me so I wouldn't be the only new girl

Bonnie - Carries my favourite chocolate in case he sees me

Saoirse - Leaves me notes about how she loves me whenever she stays over

Polly - Knows how I take my tea

Arthur - Looks after us at the Garrison

Tommy - Gave me a decent job

Finn - Carries spare ribbons and hair ties for me

Michael - Sends me clothes that I might like from America

Charlie Strong - Always finds me something interesting in his packages

Jeremiah - Taught me how to read

Isiah - Always tells me how Ezzie is doing if he's heard from her and I haven't

Linda - Bought me books that I could read

Lizzie - Teaches me new things

Charlie - Called me Aunty first

Ada - Showed me how to walk in heels

Karl - Made me a painting at school

Johnny Doggs - Updates me and Finn on how Esme and the kids are going

Curly - Looks after Charlotte when I ask him to

I placed my pen down, and Lizzie looked at the page.

"I thought you would've put the way that Finn dragged me around to buy four-poster beds so you could be comfortable in each other's beds," Lizzie said dryly, making my eyebrows shoot up.

It made sense now. The curtains could block out the light from my window for Finn, and I could still get my air whilst there was no light hitting us.

I felt my stomach growl, making me blush.

"Go have lunch," Lizzie made a shooing gesture, making me chuckle, and say see you later.

I grabbed the picnic basket from my feet and crossed the room to the door, opening it.

Tommy was standing just outside of the door. He quickly stepped out of my way with a nod. I nodded back at him, and headed down to Finn's office, which had finally had his name on the door.

I knocked, and heard a faint 'come in'. I opened the door, and Finn was just pulling on his coat, getting ready to leave.

He grinned when he saw me, which sent butterflies through my stomach. He quickly crossed the room, adjusting his cap on his head

"Did the flowers get there alright?" He asked as he walked through the door.

I swung it shut behind him, "Yeah, Billy walked them to me with Charlie's help."

"He does love his aunty Bee," Finn chuckled as I slipped my free hand into his.

He gave it a squeeze as we walked through the building, and exited it. We were heading to the park for lunch, to have a picnic.

We chatted as we walked, talking about the fact that we would have to buy new furniture. Esme had agreed to let the kids come visit on the weekend, and the furniture at the apartment didn't have the room to fit nine people, so we had to buy a new dining table, and a new set of armchairs and lounges. Maybe even two lounges. We agreed to get a dark colour, though, to hide stains with ease.

Soon enough, we arrived at the park, and picked a spot on the grass to sit on. I grabbed the blanket out of the basket and handed it to Finn, who spread it out. I sat down, putting the basket next to me.

Finn grabbed out the sandwiches, and the lemonade, handing me mine.

"You know, Lizzie is very disappointed that you haven't taken me on a date yet. She's ordering you to do so." I said as I unwrapped my sandwich, making him laugh.

"Well, tell her I'll take you to the carnival on the weekend, then." Finn replied easily, leaning back and laying his head down in my lap, removing his cap.

"I shall," I replied, then leaned back and took the first bite of my sandwich, being mindful not to drop any crumbs onto Finn.

I finished my first sandwich, and crumbled up the paper that I wrapped my sandwich with, throwing it back into the picnic basket.

"Play with my hair?" Finn requested, and I dusted my hands off, then ran them through his gelled curls, making him hum in approval and close his eyes.

I looked down at my husband, the sun shining down on his freckled face. I brought one hand away from his hair and gently stroked his jaw line, making him shudder.

"Not eating lunch until you get back?" I asked him, making him nod, eyes still closed.

Most of the times he ate with me, but sometimes he didn't feel like lunch until later. Those days were usually the ones in which he was fed up with his work.

I looked up at the sun, and sighed as I felt it shine down on my face. It wasn't too strong, a pleasant warmth. The rest of today was going to be a good day. I could feel it.

I thought about Finn taking me to the carnival, and I felt my face get a tiny bit warmer, and I couldn't blame it on the sun. I felt giddy, and excited.

§§§

Okay so I brought their first date forward lol it was originally going to be in chapter 30 but I got impatient 💔

Also I started this story one month ago!! Thank you all for supporting me with it :))

Love y'all ❤️

- Sunflower x

NEXT PART

Part 25

TAGLIST

@meadownicolee

@toothlessmcleod

@im-your-possession

@bethabear12

@paisley-37

@shelundeadxxxx

CONTRARY - FINN SHELBY X READER; PART 11

PUBLISHED: 23/05/2022

!!FIRST PART HERE!!

Part 1

MASTERLIST

THIRD PERSON'S POV

Bonnie and Aberama sat in the stables at Charlie's yard, waiting for Tommy Shelby. The horses were pacing around as if they were nervous about what was about to happen.

A person came storming through the door, carrying a lantern and placing it on the table. Tommy. He had a cigarette hanging out of the corner of his mouth, as usual. He reached into his coat, and pulled out some bills, putting them onto the table in front of Aberama.

"Uh, two." Aberama protested, "We killed two."

He looked back at Bonnie proudly.

Tommy pulled the cigarette from his lips, "You also shot a copper."

"Shot in the arm — with purpose," Aberama replied, not missing a beat, "There's a copper on the floor, the Stratford Constabulary will swarm all over it."

"The copperas alive. Got a description of the Italians. The Italians will be forced underground. We're gypsies. We're already underground," Aberama stated proudly, Bonnie taking a sip of his drink in silent agreement.

Tommy swallowed as he looked at the pair, placing the cigarette back into his mouth as he reached back into his coat.

"You yourself inflicted the no casualties this end so..." Aberama trailed off as Tommy threw the wad onto the table.

Aberama grabbed it, "You know, Mr. Shelby, maybe you've been pushing around pieces of paper too long."

"Luca Changretta got away. You let him get away." Tommy said simply, pointing at the pair, "When our paths cross I won't be so careless."

Aberama looked up from the table, smirking at Tommy, "And when will your paths cross?"

"Soon." Tommy announced, taking a long draw from his cigarette.

"You gave us too much money," Bonnie pointed out as Tommy exhaled the smoke, earning a cuff around the ears from his father.

"Your sister, the newest Shelby, was in that Rolls Royce. The Italians have her. I figured you could use some compensation." Tommy announced, placing the cigarette back into his mouth and grabbing the lantern, quickly exiting the stables, leaving Bonnie and Aberama in shock.

•••

You came to, tied to a steel chair. You tried to get out of your restraints, to no avail. You looked around the room you were in. Concrete floor, concrete walls, one set of wooden stairs leading up to a door. No windows, but there was a rickety fan above you, along with a flickering light that hurt to look at.

The door opened, and through it came a man you had only seen in photos. Luca Changretta. He was carrying a wooden chair of his own. He silently walked down the creaky stairs, placed the chair onto the floor, dragging it over until it was in front of you, then he sat himself down in it gracefully. Another man came down and sat on the stairs. You didn’t know him.

Luca produced a cigarette from his pocket, and placed it into his mouth, then pulled a lighter out and lit the cigarette. You stared at the flame on the end as he took his first puff, watching the white paper turn to ash. He stared at you, as if trying to figure you out.

He removed the cigarette from his mouth, then tapped it against his knee, removing the ash from the end. He flipped it around in his fingers as he held it out to you, silently offering you a draw.

You shook your head, “I don’t smoke. I don’t like the smell of it.”

“Smart girl,” Luca replied, bringing the cigarette back to his mouth, “You’d be too young to smoke, wouldn’t you?”

“Sixteen,” You supplied, knowing full well that he would know how old you were.

“Yeah, I heard that through the grapevine,” Luca muttered, “And that you were married. Congratulations to you, and your husband, Mr. Finn Shelby.”

You narrowed your eyes, then spat on the man’s cheek. He sighed as he used his shirt sleeve to remove the substance from his face.

“I take it that your husband is a sore spot?” Luca asked, eyes flickering over your scowling face.

“I hate him and he hates me, our families married us for the benefit of everyone but me and Finn!” You snapped, making Luca give a short nod.

You knew what he was doing. You had done the same in the past. He was interrogating you to see if he could use you to get to the Shelby family. Unfortunately for him, they all hated you. Or so you thought.

“That’s rough. I apologise,” Luca said, not one sincere note in his tone.

“Is now the time we hold hands and confess our mutual feelings of hate for the Shelby family?” You snarked, making Luca chuckle.

“You’re exactly like your ma described,” Luca informed you, taking another draw from his cigarette, “She’s a real piece of work, you know? She gave you up for a few bottles of cocaine.”

Smart. She could sell them to support her for a little while. With how frugally she lived, you wouldn’t be surprised if it supported her for the rest of her life.

You snorted, “She sure does know how to make her only child feel loved and supported. Her and my father, he palmed me off to the Shelby family for fuck all. Then, the Shelby family doesn’t even like me. I got into a fight with Arthur Shelby’s wife, have you seen her, Linda, that blonde one who has the holier than thou expression on her face at all times? Yeah, her, so, none of them like me. They don’t like the fact that I upset their little Finny too.”

“Sounds like you’re trying to make it out that they don’t care for you,” Luca pointed out, making you frown.

“No one cares,” You replied quietly, “That’s why they push me to the side. If my own mother gave me up for a few bottles of cocaine then why would people that I’ve been thrown at love me? I’m just always in their way. My own husband doesn’t love me, and it’s going to be that way until one of us dies because we’re not allowed to divorce.”

Luca felt a pang of sadness in his chest as you spoke. It sounded as if you really believed those words.

“Your little act would fool me if your ma — and other informants — didn’t tail you and Finn around for the past week. I know they all like you. So, I’m keeping you here until either one of them dies or I get sick of seeing your face and kill you myself. Lucky for you, you’ve got a pretty face so you might be able to stay for a while,” Luca decided, leaning one arm back on his chair, then turning around to face the other man on the stairs, “Matteo, come help me move our guest upstairs so she can take a phone call. Oh, and (Y/N)? If you kill a man of mine, I’ll kill a member of the Shelby family to even it up, starting with your little husband.”

As the two men came over and untied you, then led you upstairs, you decided one thing; protect the Shelby family at any cost, even if that cost was your life.

One life lost to keep a family together wouldn’t hurt anyone.

§§§

oooh shit just got real lmao

Love y’all ❤️

- Sunflower x

NEXT PART

Part 12