I Love That The Internet Saw People Comparing Women And Other Alienated Groups Of People And Went, “they’re

idk even know what this is i just found this in my draft at 4 am

another crack(ish) prompt but do you think that billy would solve things peacefully/casually??? ppl expect him to be flashy or punch a lot because of his personality, powers or something but NOPE

like think about it

-he’s having a fight with a villain and he just wants to talk instead of fight

-a god/dess shows up, wanting to destroy something/the world and billy’s like: “sup, want some burgers?” 

-“what are burgers?” (cue the JL, billy and the deity eating burgers in mcdonalds)

-another take on the burgers one: “do you want burgers?” “champion of magic, what the fuck” 

-*villian goes on a rant about how their life sucked* 

billy: do you need a hug,,, wanna get a milkshake,,,,

The JL (specifically Bruce) kept sending notifications whenever Billy was at someone’s house and was about to sleep in. Billy got more house invites and with the house invites because the JL wanted him to sleep over at their places badly. And because of this, Billy got more nonsense calls/emergencies/missions. The JL (unintentionally) created a problem for the boy.

I feel like John won by accident because Billy was just tired from all the nonsense notifs that came everytime he was at someone’s house. Once John (unknowing of the rule) invited Billy over to the House of Mystery/his house/or something,  Billy was like “fuck manners, im fucking tired from JL shit” and slept

(or billy knew and he wanted john to win,,, who knows)

Due to the amount of League members who wanted to adopt/foster Billy Batson, A rule was created. Whoever gets Billy to fall asleep and spend the night at their house, gets to keep him.

Bruce thought he won when Billy fell asleep on one of his many couches. However, Dick bursted in saying how ‘he had to see his new baby brother’; prompting Billy to wake up and leave. Afterwards, Bruce would not talk to Dick for 3 days.

Clark came close when Jon and Billy were about to have a sleepover, but urgent JL notification came in. Meaning both Clark and Billy had to leave. Clark still thinks the notification was a set up by Bruce. (It was)

Diana claimed to win, but after some investigation it was found that Billy had spent the night at Themyscira, not Diana’s actual house.

Almost every member of the JL has tried. None has succeed.

its the abandonment issues, dw

Every member of the Justice League has the shared instinct to parent Billy Batson, except Billy Batson does not want to be parented which has resulted in multiple fights between almost the entire League vs. one ten year old who refuses to take a nap and eat a sandwich

i got galaxy vans today and now call them “The Billy Kaplan Vans”

Green Lantern: What if we kissed 😳 in your self-driving Batmobile 🤔 haha jk 😎 unless??? 👉👈

Batman: How did you say those emojis out loud?

GUYS MY S/O FISCOVERED MY AO3 ACCOUNT AND TUMBLR IM SO EMBARRASED SKSJJSJDIDJDKD

(mmm adventures of tired+bitchass DILF constantine and a swearing sunshine 12 year old kid) this is a horribly long list im sorry; im adding to the "john and shazam are dating misunderstanding" hc i saw when browsing

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due to billy's reaction at canary telling him that john kissed zantanna, word gets around that john is lowkey polyamorous

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the engagement party is somewhat awkward cuz john and billy are like: ??? what????

billy, as he sees john being congratulated on his "engagement" by the members of the jl: is john getting married to zantanna?

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i said this before but when the league sees john with billy (without him being shazam/chilling in his true form), everyone assumes that billy’s john and shazam’s adopted kid

green arrow: how's life with your dads?

billy, in his true form, confused: don't you mean dad?

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when billy (as shazam) accidentally stubs his toe onto something hard, the jl hears the loudest "FUCK!" from him and thinks that he's gotten into john's swearing habits

superman: i see you have gotten some...habits

billy, who swears like a sailor all the time and thinks superman is mentioning his lessons with john: okay???

This is fantastic and cursed, I love it.

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Captain Marvel: (Injured)

Superman: (panicking) You’re husband is coming soon, just hang in there.

Captain Marvel, who is too injured to understand what was just said to him: k

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John: He’s a handful to put to bed.

Captain Marvel: Hey, it’s not my fault I want to keep playing!

The entire league, not knowing Cap was talking about animal crossing: 😶

hahaha crack pairings/ships am i right

Ratchet is hosting a Zoom call and chaos ensues

♡ PLEASE DON’T REPOST MY ART, REBLOG INSTEAD ♡

Transformers "More Than Meets The Eye" comic has recently torpedoed me down the feelsy space car robots hellhole, an therefore i present a sketchy collection of Lost Light crew as homo sapiens. I had SO MUCH fun coming up with the designs! Now off to actually learn how to draw robots i guess