Heard Porn Bots Might Be Following You Guys Again. Sorry About That. But In Some Good News I Have Been

Its me qtip don’t listen to them boy put me in your ear

do i deserve back pain at this age

oh and that gap in my resume is when i was digging my own grave

I've realized recently that every time I'm asked for socials my response is sorta "oh i don't have twitter" "I'm not on Instagram much" "i uninstalled TikTok a few months ago" and this has led people into believing I'm just someone who doesn't do social media but in reality you can find me in here lets get it on cunts monday through shawty like a melody sunday, 9am to 12am, posting blorbo.

love the genre of tumblr posts that start out "DESTROY THE MYTH THAT" followed by something you've never heard any human being say

i'm literally begging people to relearn how to use earbuds and headphones. i don't wanna hear your fucking tiktok while im waiting for my flight.

“I want to decompose in a bog” well you clearly don’t know the first thing about bogs. Clout chaser

having a 3yo brother means i get exposed to kids’ shows way more often than i thought i would at this point in my life, but man, binge watching thomas the tank engine as an adult is a wild fucking experience

all these trains (and there’s like 20 counting locomotives alone, don’t even get me started on the anthropomorphic train cabins) are MAD competitive the whole time and will constantly fuck up their own whole day by tring to prove they’re the biggest baddest train. and like, i understand that you gotta get you plot from somewhere and i imagine plotlines like this happen in cars etc. as well, but the other day i was watching and i noticed that all these goddamn locomotives have DRIVERS in them. that apparently have no control over their train’s actions at all whatsoever. so these trains wake up, pick up their drivers, go to work, get taunted by another train who’s like “ha ha i see u there with your 4 cabins but did you know i can pull SIX cabins and still fucking book it at 80mph” and the 4 cabin train will be like “fuck it i gotta prove myself now, hook me up with 4 more cabins” and will inevitably derail themselves or some shit while the engine driver just shuts up and kicks back the whole time

i explained this to my brother and was like, is that fucked up or what, but he just pointed at the green train and went “that’s percy” so i guess that’s his take on the situation

the library.

ONE: The library is simply that. The Library. It has no name - at least, not one in human tongue.

TWO: You do not find the library. The library finds you. You will see it when and if you need it, no matter what. It is open all year round, every hour of the day. It never closes. Never.

THREE: The librarian is always on duty, whether you see them or not. You may worry that they are not sleeping enough, or are not taking care of themselves. Do not. They do not need your concern.

FOUR: The library, for all intents and purposes, appears to have only two floors from the outside. Occasionally, you may hear movement in floors above and below which you cannot locate. That is okay. Those floors are simply not meant for you.

FIVE: You may borrow any books you need. Do not worry about returns - they will find their own way back.

SIX: There is no visible organisational system. Feel free to ask the librarian for help or assistance - they will point you to the right shelves, and vice versa.

SEVEN: Occasionally, you may see a book vanish before your eyes. Do not be alarmed. Something else has simply borrowed it, and it will be returned soon enough.

EIGHT: Time passes differently within the library. When you leave, do not be concerned if it is far later (or, in some cases, earlier) than it was when you came in.

NINE: Ultimately, the library is a quiet place. However, if you ever notice that even the books have stopped breathing, alert the librarian and exit as calmly and quickly as possible. They will deal with it.