Get Behind Me Girl I'll Protect You From Phones Without Headphone Jacks

I see you've noticed my overhead mural of mushrooms. That's myceiling.

You wrote about murder?? Murder is illegal?? You wrote about this dude killing someone and you didn’t even say ‘murder is bad’ at the start of the book, wht wtf, wtf is wrong with you? I can’t believe you condone murder, I can’t believe you’re pro murber, oh my fucking God don'ttalk to me when ou literally kill people, freak. I’m calling the cops, what the fuck, I’m shaking and crying.

the whole “i’m an evil monster because i have to kill and eat innocent people to survive :’(” angst in ‘regular human gets turned into supernatural monster’ stories is so stupid. like how is that even a problem??? there are also plenty of corrupt billionaires, abusers and cops out there for you to snack on

Coyote fact ? Coyote facts ? A crumb ? Plwease ? Coyote ?

coyotes are naturally social animals, but their pack structure is a LOT looser than wolf packs are and so it's not at all unusual to see a coyote living and hunting alone!

but what IS unusual is that these lone coyotes will sometimes partner up with other animals for hunts who are... definitely not coyotes.

not even canines, in fact!

yeah that's right, sometimes a coyote will straight up find a fucking american badger and decide, HEYYO, it's the Burt to my Ernie! the Frog to my Toad! the Jelly to my crunchy-style Peanut Butter! let's go kill something together, new best friend.

and then they do.

the way it works is that the odd couple will find a group of burrowing prey animals, like ground squirrels or prairie dogs, and start digging them out of their holes.

the prey is confounded- if they break out of their holes and flee, the coyote will use its superior speed to run them down, but if they stay put, the badger is just going to pry them up out of the damp earth and eat them anyway!

WHAT'S A POOR GROUND SQUIRREL TO DO.

nothing. they just get eaten. badger/coyote duos are FAR more effective hunters than either animal could hope to be on its own.

Me: *Removes my cat from my lap to do something else.*

My cat: Father is...evil? Father is unyielding? Father is incapable of love? I am running away. I am packing my little rucksack and going out to explore the world as a lone vagabond. I can no longer thrive in this household.

i hope your onions caramelize. i hope my onions caramelize. i hope we both sauté our root vegetables to perfection. slow cooked onions in loving pan.

Purrcussion

(via)

"The Siege of Terra? Ah, that's nothing complicated. It's just one planet, compared to the whole Heresy leading up to it, that's nothing! Just read the books one after another, it's mostly linear. Two factions mashing into each other, no third party interference, on one planet in one system. How bad could that even get?"

Meanwhile the "Siege of Terra" Lexicanum page:

I can't wait to get to this in about 30 volumes or so because holy does this look like an absolute chaotic trainwreck - and that is just the Commanders!

People who see pics of like those fucked up deep sea fish and creatures and go "omg I'm never going swimming in the ocean again 😰😰😰" calm down. They're 5000 feet below where you are and also i went down there and none of them even knew you. Leave them alone bitch

I Will Wait For You At The Challenger Deep